Yeah I never would’ve lasted at several jobs if it weren’t for my kids. I stayed at a firm 6 years where the average employee didn’t last 6 months because I had mouths to feed
You’re not wrong with the line of thinking that better hours will lead you to more happiness but eventually you’ll want to move on from that to have better hours and better job
You tryin to be a hero fool? You wanna see badass mother fucker?! I'll show ya a badass!!!
I do get where MC is coming from as far as the music aspect tho. We spent our whole lives wit only one career path in mind (Music) and that not working out can be an extremely bitter pill to swallow. Can also feel thankless cause you spend your entire life honing a craft and putting countless hours in, for damn near no payoff. I’ve mostly accepted music not being my career. I didn’t accept defeat, because anything can happen and literally one song can change your life, but it’s an industry that requires too many instances of “Right place, right time”, too much knowing the right person and having the right connection, etc., jus too many constants and variables away from the actual music and talent that can’t be fully depended on and controlled, so it’s no longer something I’m banking on as a guarantee. And I say that on the cusp of having my literal best streaming year ever. This created 2 different frames of mind. On one hand, it does make you kinda wanna say “Fuck it.” because that driving force beforehand was always “This is my career, I’m gonna give this everything I got.” So if that career aspect is gone, it kinda becomes “Why bother?” between all the time, effort, and money spent to create more music. On the other tho, I also looked at it like this; this year alone, I spent $6K-$8K on gaming. That’s a whole lotta time, effort, and money, no? For something that will most likely never become a career and pay me. Unless my Twitch were to explode lmao which I’m not banking on but hey, never say never. But why did I spend that much and give it that much effort? Strictly for the love and passion for it, same as music. So when that clicked for me, all that doubt went away. I’ll always make music because it’s 110% who I am and I’ll always love it and that feeling of sitting back when a song is finished and knowing you made a straight up hit will never stop being the best feeling in the world, regardless of how many people listen to it after that. Ironically, I actually been making my best shit ever as a result. It’s liberating honestly. “I’m not making any of this for anything other than making some good fucking music and satisfying myself.”
I know the talent is there, I know I’m making industry level records that stand toe to toe wit the artists I look up to. These records get easier and easier to make and come to me so naturally now that it’s like breathing. I’ve gotten royalty checks and literally got paid for my imagination, even if it wasn’t enough to live off. So wit that said, I’ve already accomplished the 2 main things I set out to do when I dreamed about music as a kid. How could I ever be bitter about that? Music will always be 100% who I am to my core, from the way I dress and present myself, to the way I live, between all the concerts and festivals, and even the extreme amount of music I listen to constantly in both my free time and while getting shit done. It simply does not stop, so how could I ever stop making it, even if it’s not my job? At the very least, it’s a very satisfying and fulfilling hobby. Again I draw the gaming comparison. I can spend a lot of time beating a game and beating it may be fun, but it ultimately rewards me nothing, and nobody gives a shit what I beat lmao. But a finished well written song is there forever once you put it out, and it never stops feeling good. Like “Damn this is MINE. I MADE this. Nobody can tell me shit.” So if I were to drop it simply because it didn’t become my career, I might as well drop gaming too and my reef tank and anything else that I enjoy that cost a lot of money and effort.
IMO your art will improve if you aren't doing it with the idea that it could be a career, and just do it because its what you like doing with your free time anyways.
I do get where MC is coming from as far as the music aspect tho. We spent our whole lives wit only one career path in mind (Music) and that not working out can be an extremely bitter pill to swallow. Can also feel thankless cause you spend your entire life honing a craft and putting countless hours in, for damn near no payoff. I’ve mostly accepted music not being my career. I didn’t accept defeat, because anything can happen and literally one song can change your life, but it’s an industry that requires too many instances of “Right place, right time”, too much knowing the right person and having the right connection, etc., jus too many constants and variables away from the actual music and talent that can’t be fully depended on and controlled, so it’s no longer something I’m banking on as a guarantee. And I say that on the cusp of having my literal best streaming year ever. This created 2 different frames of mind. On one hand, it does make you kinda wanna say “Fuck it.” because that driving force beforehand was always “This is my career, I’m gonna give this everything I got.” So if that career aspect is gone, it kinda becomes “Why bother?” between all the time, effort, and money spent to create more music. On the other tho, I also looked at it like this; this year alone, I spent $6K-$8K on gaming. That’s a whole lotta time, effort, and money, no? For something that will most likely never become a career and pay me. Unless my Twitch were to explode lmao which I’m not banking on but hey, never say never. But why did I spend that much and give it that much effort? Strictly for the love and passion for it, same as music. So when that clicked for me, all that doubt went away. I’ll always make music because it’s 110% who I am and I’ll always love it and that feeling of sitting back when a song is finished and knowing you made a straight up hit will never stop being the best feeling in the world, regardless of how many people listen to it after that. Ironically, I actually been making my best shit ever as a result. It’s liberating honestly. “I’m not making any of this for anything other than making some good fucking music and satisfying myself.”
I know the talent is there, I know I’m making industry level records that stand toe to toe wit the artists I look up to. These records get easier and easier to make and come to me so naturally now that it’s like breathing. I’ve gotten royalty checks and literally got paid for my imagination, even if it wasn’t enough to live off. So wit that said, I’ve already accomplished the 2 main things I set out to do when I dreamed about music as a kid. How could I ever be bitter about that? Music will always be 100% who I am to my core, from the way I dress and present myself, to the way I live, between all the concerts and festivals, and even the extreme amount of music I listen to constantly in both my free time and while getting shit done. It simply does not stop, so how could I ever stop making it, even if it’s not my job? At the very least, it’s a very satisfying and fulfilling hobby. Again I draw the gaming comparison. I can spend a lot of time beating a game and beating it may be fun, but it ultimately rewards me nothing, and nobody gives a shit what I beat lmao. But a finished well written song is there forever once you put it out, and it never stops feeling good. Like “Damn this is MINE. I MADE this. Nobody can tell me shit.” So if I were to drop it simply because it didn’t become my career, I might as well drop gaming too and my reef tank and anything else that I enjoy that cost a lot of money and effort.
There is a stark difference between playing video games, even spending massive amounts of money on it, as a hobby, vs what I was doing, or attempting to do, with music. Even with my Youtube channel there was a massive difference in the time and energy I spent doing Under The Bun vs From Those Ashes. And so when it was time to stop Under The Bun, it didn't really matter to me. That was ALWAYS a hobby. That was ALWAYS just something I was doing for fun, and nothing more.
Music was always something I wanted to take further. I dont mean something I could live off of necessarily. I'm not so deluded to think I wouldn't need a day job. But it was always something I wanted to share with other people. But if nobody is listening, and nobody is coming to shows then, like you said, what is the point? Why am I doing this?
If I or ANYBODY was TRULY doing music JUST for themselves, then we wouldn't be releasing music for others to hear. We wouldnt be putting it on streaming sites and playing shows. But in reality, it isn't about doing it for "ourselves". And it never was. And it was devastating putting my soul into music I wanted other people to hear, only for nobody to give a shit about it.
Sure I can TRULY do music for myself, and jam around in my basement, and I probably will jam out in my basement on my days off. But that is completely different than writing, and practicing, and recording, and performing, and selling merch, and uploading streams, and trying to get people to listen to my music. Because music is far to intimately tied to being a social experience for that. At least for me. I cant just keep my music for myself. I need others to experience it too, and if others dont want to experience it, then it isn't worth doing anymore.
But that’s my point. I’m going to be publicly releasing music too. I have 2 projects coming out 2024. And of course I want as many people listening to it as possible. But even if they didn’t, I still have that self satisfaction of knowing I made some great records that I love listening to.
Holy shit we have it good here when it comes to modern medicine. I mean the system is fucked from top to bottom when it come to insurance and billing and what not, and all insurance sellers are certainly scum, but modern medicine is an amazing thing, especially if you get some third world shit to compare it to.
My bother in law went to the Philippines right before Covid hit and he got locked down over there. He ended up getting married and having two kids over there. Mortality rates there are crazy high. Everyone has a brothers and sisters that die during childhood, it’s a very normal thing for them. BIL’s youngest baby Kia (like the car lol) got very sick and developed a rash that wouldn’t stop bleeding. They had to take the baby island hopping in little ferry boats to go see a doctor. They have to pay $5,000 up front to see the doctor. Blood test come back scary and they have to do an emergency blood transfusion. Can’t do it there so they had to hop islands again. Her blood platelets are so low so a bump that would normally cause a bruise could be fatal. Gotta jump on the ferry anyway. Doctor orders the blood. $1,000 right now. The patients family have to go get the blood themselves, there is no bloodmobile that shows up with it. They go island hoping, get the blood, one back on the ferry, go to the island with the hospital, nobody can find the doctor. 12 hours later the doctor is found but now the blood has expired or gone bad from lack of refrigeration. Gotta go buy more blood. They need medicine but the medicine can’t be found. When its finally tracked down, is $1,000 per pill pay now or off with you. We spent most of the weekend expecting to hear some very tragic news but the medicine seems to be working. Her blood platelets aren’t fully back in normal range yet but they have drastically risen past the point where they could do surgery if the situation came to it and she has been sent back home.
I went into urgent care instead of the er for my kidney stone. People were lucky I was even there I didn’t know where I was going. Giving this lady my information in crippling pain and the nurse missing my vein for painkillers twice in the urgent care before someone came from the er and took me. Got a bill from both of em.
Got a job offer for the insurance place, but they're only offering $48k, so it doesnt solve anything
Bro I can tell you right now it's gonna be near impossible to find a entry level job paying 60k from the start. Was the insurance gig a sales job? Did it include bonuses or commission not in that 48k salary?
Got a job offer for the insurance place, but they're only offering $48k, so it doesnt solve anything
Bro I can tell you right now it's gonna be near impossible to find a entry level job paying 60k from the start. Was the insurance gig a sales job? Did it include bonuses or commission not in that 48k salary?
No bonuses or comission. Its not sales, its operations/customer service
I asked if they'll meet me at $50k. I cant leave my current position for less than that. Hell I still might not take it. Because again, this doesnt solve anything for me.
Comments
Music was always something I wanted to take further. I dont mean something I could live off of necessarily. I'm not so deluded to think I wouldn't need a day job. But it was always something I wanted to share with other people. But if nobody is listening, and nobody is coming to shows then, like you said, what is the point? Why am I doing this?
If I or ANYBODY was TRULY doing music JUST for themselves, then we wouldn't be releasing music for others to hear. We wouldnt be putting it on streaming sites and playing shows. But in reality, it isn't about doing it for "ourselves". And it never was. And it was devastating putting my soul into music I wanted other people to hear, only for nobody to give a shit about it.
Sure I can TRULY do music for myself, and jam around in my basement, and I probably will jam out in my basement on my days off. But that is completely different than writing, and practicing, and recording, and performing, and selling merch, and uploading streams, and trying to get people to listen to my music. Because music is far to intimately tied to being a social experience for that. At least for me. I cant just keep my music for myself. I need others to experience it too, and if others dont want to experience it, then it isn't worth doing anymore.
If they did If I would consider it.
Personally i would never go to the muskegon hospital though. IM driving to GR even if im having a heart attack.
I asked if they'll meet me at $50k. I cant leave my current position for less than that. Hell I still might not take it. Because again, this doesnt solve anything for me.