Mc has it all figured out lol it's all chemicals right ? Alright mr scientist I want you to explain the chemical processes of the brain that make you feel the sensations that one would confuse as love.. In your own words now , no articles.. Since you have such a firm, unmovable grasp of the subject.. I thought you were only interested in philosophy not science? Your notions are laughable
I don't understand why he discusses such a subject if "there is no discussion..I will never accept any other way of thinking than my own". I'm failing to see the logic in his thought process on any of this
Mc has it all figured out lol it's all chemicals right ? Alright mr scientist I want you to explain the chemical processes of the brain that make you feel the sensations that one would confuse as love.. In your own words now , no articles.. Since you have such a firm, unmovable grasp of the subject.. I thought you were only interested in philosophy not science? Your notions are laughable
Your brain releases oxytocin when in situations that many view of as "romantic" or sexual. That feeling of elation you feel is actually your brain getting high off of the hormone that your body is releasing.
And I do mainly care about philosophy over science. And I still can't find a philosophical reason to justify how we feel, outside of that familiar love I have differentiated from romantic love. Love as a bond that connects people exists, but "love" as a method of passion and romance is merely chemical and a social construct. And that is a philosophical way to look at it.
I don't understand why he discusses such a subject if "there is no discussion..I will never accept any other way of thinking than my own". I'm failing to see the logic in his thought process on any of this
I have a lot on my mind. I posted my thoughts in the SSR thread. People bitched and made this thread. I continue to post these thoughts.
I was hoping people may see what I am saying and at least try to understand where I am coming from, and maybe agree with some parts - even if they dont apply it to their own lives.
Instead I have a forum of people disagreeing with and fighting me on every step of my thought process.
We've tried to understand where you're coming from. I know I have multiple times but through your posts I've gathered you have just given up, refuse to take in anything we say including the experiences we've had ourselves as well as the people we know in our lives. You wanted us to accept your thought process even though we don't see logic in it or understand it much. Because of this long discussions/arguments happened in order to help us better understand where you're coming from. Instead we got even more confused and continued with this subject. The fact you have told us to grow up when we have been through more than you have doesn't help either. You need to open your mind and maybe you will in time. I really do hope that 5-10 years from now you'll look back and understand wtf we've all been talking about
I don't understand why he discusses such a subject if "there is no discussion..I will never accept any other way of thinking than my own". I'm failing to see the logic in his thought process on any of this
I have a lot on my mind. I posted my thoughts in the SSR thread. People bitched and made this thread. I continue to post these thoughts.
I was hoping people may see what I am saying and at least try to understand where I am coming from, and maybe agree with some parts - even if they dont apply it to their own lives.
Instead I have a forum of people disagreeing with and fighting me on every step of my thought process.
I'm coming from the same exact situation and I know how you feel. I even agree with like 50% of what you say. But the radical shit gets aggravating and the fact that you refuse to acknowledge that you might be wrong about somethings stops me from fully relating to what you say.
I don't understand why he discusses such a subject if "there is no discussion..I will never accept any other way of thinking than my own". I'm failing to see the logic in his thought process on any of this
I have a lot on my mind. I posted my thoughts in the SSR thread. People bitched and made this thread. I continue to post these thoughts.
I was hoping people may see what I am saying and at least try to understand where I am coming from, and maybe agree with some parts - even if they dont apply it to their own lives.
Instead I have a forum of people disagreeing with and fighting me on every step of my thought process.
Has the thought even crossed your mind yet that no one agrees with you because your thought process is fucked up? Kinda like how if every person you interact with is an asshole, then maybe it's just really you that is the asshole?
I was hoping people may see what I am saying and at least try to understand where I am coming from, and maybe agree with some parts - even if they dont apply it to their own lives.
I actually agreed with you a couple pages back when I said I thought "giving up" is actually going to have a positive effect on you. There is only two problems with your implementation of giving up though...
1. You haven't actually given up on this girl you are in love with. You are just lying to yourself and making yourself more miserable in the process.
2. You've taken "given up" to an extreme level where you have invented this new philosophy where you will actually reject interpersonal relationships because it is in line with your "giving up philosophy". Being this extreme is a life error.
WakeOfAshesPosts: 21,665destroyer of motherfuckers
What you need to do is morph your "giving up" philosophy to being less anti-relationships and more self-improvement focused. You need to give up on the idea that you are a loser if you don't have a girlfriend. You need to concentrate on areas of life that you have interest in, and that bring you happiness, and finally if you happen to make friends with a girl while you are doing your thing then you need to be open to exploring that as a relationship if it starts going that way. Don't run away from girls that might show interest in you, but don't let a girls non-interest affect you either. This is easier said than done, but you can get there... I did.
Lastly, I said this 100 pages again but I will say it again. You aren't over your friend that is a girl. That friend is negatively effecting you, even if that is not her intention. Look at the text message you posted- She tells you something that frustrates her, and all you can see is the irony in it because that is the exact situation she has done to you. But she doesnt see it. And I know that you don't fault her for not seeing it, and I know you say it is not her fault that it is you that is broken.... And I can't say I disagree with you there. However what I will say is that even though it is you that is broken, continuing this relationship in it's present form is just going to continue this cycle of keeping you broken. You wont be able to heal yourself and make yourself better while you are continually being devastated by her words. You say that you'd rather be her friend and be sad, but I am telling you that you can't continue this. And I can promise you that some day this will 100% end. She will get a boyfriend and the boyfriend wont want you to be friends with her, and she will chose the boyfriend over you. 100% that will happen, count on it. So you can either spend the next 3 years in this cycle of abuse by slowly trying to take the bandaid off, or you can just rip the fucker off and start to heal today.
This is what you say to her in an email -
"This is the hardest email I have ever had to write. After much thought and reflection I have made the decision that we can no longer be friends at this point in time. My feelings of lovefor you are so strong, that everything you do I am looking for the hidden meaning that tells me you love me too. And I know this is stupid because you have told me that you don't have those sort of feelings for me, however I can not control how your words and your actions make me feel. At this point in time, we need to just stop being friends... I don't want to email, I don't want to text message, and I don't want to hang out anymore. I need time away from you such that I can properly get rid of these feelings I have for you. Maybe someday when I am no longer in love with you then I will contact you and maybe then we can be friends the right way. Please understand that I don't fault you in this at all. I don't think you were ever trying to lead me on, or make me think you were interested in me. You were literally my best friend, and I hope someday we can repair our friendship without me having to suffer over you not returning the same sort of affection I have for you today. I really wish nothing for the best for you, and I will always treasure all of our time together. Take care-MC"
> I dont have feelings for her anymore > Im not interested in dating. Period. > I certainly will turn down a girl if she is interested in me > But no girl will ever be interested in me so 0 ) > Once I make it one more year on college, my slim chances go to 0% anyway, so whats the point? > Dating in college is meaningless, so Im making that slim chance 0% > Im living off campus next year, dropping the chance further > Once again, Im over my friend :-| > Ky
You don't have feelings for her anymore because you're depressed and that's what depression does, it makes you apathetic .. You don't go from walls of doom texts about your feelings for someone to 0 fucks that fast, it just doesn't happen
Comments
And I do mainly care about philosophy over science. And I still can't find a philosophical reason to justify how we feel, outside of that familiar love I have differentiated from romantic love. Love as a bond that connects people exists, but "love" as a method of passion and romance is merely chemical and a social construct. And that is a philosophical way to look at it.
I was hoping people may see what I am saying and at least try to understand where I am coming from, and maybe agree with some parts - even if they dont apply it to their own lives.
Instead I have a forum of people disagreeing with and fighting me on every step of my thought process.
mc isn't all that different from us. Most of us thought we knew everything and had it all figured out at 21
Getting past denial is usually the first step.
1. You haven't actually given up on this girl you are in love with. You are just lying to yourself and making yourself more miserable in the process.
2. You've taken "given up" to an extreme level where you have invented this new philosophy where you will actually reject interpersonal relationships because it is in line with your "giving up philosophy". Being this extreme is a life error.
Lastly, I said this 100 pages again but I will say it again. You aren't over your friend that is a girl. That friend is negatively effecting you, even if that is not her intention. Look at the text message you posted- She tells you something that frustrates her, and all you can see is the irony in it because that is the exact situation she has done to you. But she doesnt see it. And I know that you don't fault her for not seeing it, and I know you say it is not her fault that it is you that is broken.... And I can't say I disagree with you there. However what I will say is that even though it is you that is broken, continuing this relationship in it's present form is just going to continue this cycle of keeping you broken. You wont be able to heal yourself and make yourself better while you are continually being devastated by her words. You say that you'd rather be her friend and be sad, but I am telling you that you can't continue this. And I can promise you that some day this will 100% end. She will get a boyfriend and the boyfriend wont want you to be friends with her, and she will chose the boyfriend over you. 100% that will happen, count on it. So you can either spend the next 3 years in this cycle of abuse by slowly trying to take the bandaid off, or you can just rip the fucker off and start to heal today.
This is what you say to her in an email -
"This is the hardest email I have ever had to write. After much thought and reflection I have made the decision that we can no longer be friends at this point in time. My feelings of lovefor you are so strong, that everything you do I am looking for the hidden meaning that tells me you love me too. And I know this is stupid because you have told me that you don't have those sort of feelings for me, however I can not control how your words and your actions make me feel. At this point in time, we need to just stop being friends... I don't want to email, I don't want to text message, and I don't want to hang out anymore. I need time away from you such that I can properly get rid of these feelings I have for you. Maybe someday when I am no longer in love with you then I will contact you and maybe then we can be friends the right way. Please understand that I don't fault you in this at all. I don't think you were ever trying to lead me on, or make me think you were interested in me. You were literally my best friend, and I hope someday we can repair our friendship without me having to suffer over you not returning the same sort of affection I have for you today. I really wish nothing for the best for you, and I will always treasure all of our time together. Take care-MC"
> Im not interested in dating. Period.
> I certainly will turn down a girl if she is interested in me
> But no girl will ever be interested in me so 0
> Once I make it one more year on college, my slim chances go to 0% anyway, so whats the point?
> Dating in college is meaningless, so Im making that slim chance 0%
> Im living off campus next year, dropping the chance further
> Once again, Im over my friend :-|
> Ky
Shes a good friend. ONE of my best friends. But I have three dude friends, cousins, and a brother who are above in my relationship totem.