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Post your favorite quotes that someone said something you said or something you overheard today

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  • Shanez_WifeShanez_Wife Posts: 2,008 just the tip
    The biggest fattest, ugliest nigger at my job told a black guy, "I don't use black slang language, I'm a white at heart". She uses "yo" at least twice in a sentence and is the most nigger anyone can ever get. However, she is borderline sexually harrassing this new white kid at my job. She's scaring him.
  • SkullAndCrossbonesSkullAndCrossbones Posts: 16,452 destroyer of motherfuckers
    white trash
    white white trash
    :-bd
    im a dirtbag and im proud
    "That's another thing I love about metal, it's so fuckin' huge yet certain people don't even know it exists." - Rob Zombie
  • drinkwine732drinkwine732 Posts: 20,418 destroyer of motherfuckers
    At lunch today, my friend and I were discussing bisexuality (today was Day Of Silence which was a silent protest on bullying of homosexuals which is the dumbest idea ever because since when does bottling things up solve anything?)

    Me: A lot of people just say they are because they're attention whores. "Oh yeah, I'm bisexual." Well have you ever actually been with someone of the same sex? "No..." Then I guess you aren't. That would be like me saying I'm a magician. "Oh, do you know any cool magic tricks?" No, but it sounds cool right?
    Thumbs up.
    My Top Albumsidrinkwine732's Profile Page
  • Bottle_TreeBottle_Tree Posts: 7,166 just the tip
    Just came back from a friend's house. We were talking about music and got on the subject of Jimi Hendrix...

    Him: You know he overdosed on crack, right?
    Me: LOL dude, he died from drinking too much red wine!
    Him: OMG, he died?! When did that happen?!
    Me: ...Are you... are you serious?
    Him: Uh, yeah. I had no idea!
    Me: I might as well let you know Janis Joplin is dead, too.
    Him: Who's that?

    Mfw:
    {Upload|9354}
  • JLRedWing13JLRedWing13 Posts: 48,722 mod
    LOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    JLRedWing13's Profile PagePhotobucketimage
  • That_Guy_ArloThat_Guy_Arlo Posts: 14,026 master of ceremonies
    Just came back from a friend's house. We were talking about music and got on the subject of Jimi Hendrix...

    Him: You know he overdosed on crack, right?
    Me: LOL dude, he died from drinking too much red wine!
    Him: OMG, he died?! When did that happen?!
    Me: ...Are you... are you serious?
    Him: Uh, yeah. I had no idea!
    Me: I might as well let you know Janis Joplin is dead, too.
    Him: Who's that?

    Get new friends.........for real.
  • Razor_SharkRazor_Shark Posts: 12,604 balls deep
    {Upload|9376}

    This is me, doing what I want to do to your friend Ellie.
    image
  • SkullAndCrossbonesSkullAndCrossbones Posts: 16,452 destroyer of motherfuckers
    i want to see that in 3D @-)
    "That's another thing I love about metal, it's so fuckin' huge yet certain people don't even know it exists." - Rob Zombie
  • StratophonyStratophony Posts: 9,212 just the tip
    Jimi Hendrix would lace his bandana with LDS.... and once he started to sweat and his pores would open up; he'd blast off on his trip
  • MetalSSlayerMetalSSlayer Posts: 6,164 destroyer of motherfuckers
    "Fuck the sidewalk, fix the roads first. I'm not going to blow the sole of my shoe on a cracked sidewalk."
  • KridesBrideBrittKridesBrideBritt Posts: 25,781 jayfacer
    My dad: "There's been more tomatoes in the past week than the past few months."
    My brother: "What? Tomatoes?"
    My dad: "Sorry, I meant tornadoes."
    My brother: "Tomatoes are nothing like tornadoes."
    My dad: "I'm cutting tomatoes. Shut the fuck up, you smart ass little shit."

    :-))
    kristianPhotobucketPhotobucket Trephination-Tuesday Nights/Wednesday Mornings...11pm-1am- http://wrsu.rutgers.edu/listen.html
  • SkullAndCrossbonesSkullAndCrossbones Posts: 16,452 destroyer of motherfuckers
    edited April 2011
    My dad: "There's been more tomatoes in the past week than the past few months."
    My brother: "What? Tomatoes?"
    My dad: "Sorry, I meant tornadoes."
    My brother: "Tomatoes are nothing like tornadoes."
    My dad: "I'm cutting tomatoes. Shut the fuck up, you smart ass little shit."

    :-))
    :-))
    {Upload|9392}
    "That's another thing I love about metal, it's so fuckin' huge yet certain people don't even know it exists." - Rob Zombie
  • KridesBrideBrittKridesBrideBritt Posts: 25,781 jayfacer
    :-)) My brother gives me a run for my money with smartass comments, then again, I trained him well.
    kristianPhotobucketPhotobucket Trephination-Tuesday Nights/Wednesday Mornings...11pm-1am- http://wrsu.rutgers.edu/listen.html
  • BrianBrian Posts: 17,611 destroyer of motherfuckers
    edited April 2011
    My English teacher makes us write stupid journal topics that he doesn't read, he just stamps if we do them, so I've began to just go off on a tangent for the lulz on all of them.

    Here's an excerpt from today's journal on "How do I feel when the lights are off and I'm in my bed?":

    "This friday we have off because it is Good Friday, where we celebrate the death of fictional character Jesus Christ. After his death, Jesus was reincarnated into a rabbit that gave out gifts. Unfortunately, the Jews snatched up all the presents. Historians believe this to be the source of the conflict between Israel and Palestine."
    nike Pictures, Images and PhotosTUPAC IS DEAD/THE LEGEND IS GONE/THEY SAYIN TUPAC'S BACK?/DEM NIGGAS WRONG
  • OPPOPP Posts: 50,132 spicy boy
    I wrote something very similar to that in high school.

    Only difference is that I got caught XD
    I love winning with women
  • GazorpazorpfieldGazorpazorpfield Posts: 22,293 master of ceremonies
    edited April 2011
    Lol my language teacher doesn't even do anything with our journal...Sometimes she glances at it. So I either re-date a previous entry so it passes for the day, or I go as far off topic as I can. "What do you think 'X' quote means?"
    "If I could be any animal for a day, I would chose to be a bald eagle. Just think about how bad ass it would be to not just a gigantic bird of prey, but a national symbol as well. Tell me you would pass that up to be a dolphin, and I'll I tell you about one less person I care about. Stupid Commie."
    image Photobucket
  • ZmbieFlavrdCupcakesZmbieFlavrdCupcakes Posts: 32,259 jayfacer
    lmao Chuck
    but really, id ass it up to be a dolphin
    imageimage
  • LeaLea Posts: 1,549 balls deep
    Lea: you don't think I could tackle him?

    Jacob: no
    I don't
    lol

    Lea: why?

    Jacob: Because Ape strikes me as a big, strong ginger lol

    Lea: lmao
    so?

    Jacob: So unless you come from behind and get a running start.....lol

    Lea: I could do it. I'm a big girl. =P

    Jacob: <_>
    Whatever you say.
  • KridesBrideBrittKridesBrideBritt Posts: 25,781 jayfacer
    :-))
    kristianPhotobucketPhotobucket Trephination-Tuesday Nights/Wednesday Mornings...11pm-1am- http://wrsu.rutgers.edu/listen.html
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