Post your favorite quotes that someone said something you said or something you overheard today

NOCAP

Kid to guy that looks like Jesus in my class
"Hey Jesus, why are you Atheist?"

OPP

"I'm going out with my mom"
-my drunk friend the other night

NOLA

"This Is New Orleans, we kill people muthafucker"
-some dude yelled it at the top of his lungs. I have no clue who the guy was talking to, but it happened during the parade today.

NOCAP

"You shouldn't be mod"

Made my night

Ace_Deputy_Cheeze

Ed is a great mod

Edit: dont change my pozt >_<

Jormungandr

"the bear Jew"

sbs_will

"no, its the pink flamingos turn to drive the tank"

-my friend while he was sleepin

laurjohn2

"stop playing with yourself while your eating" - i said to my son

NOCAP

"You get arrested if you driving in a car at night and you're black"

What I said to my friend Danielle

NOCAP

"That girl goin round cappin niggaz up"

Rex_Capone420

what a chick said to me and my buddys sat.-"how lucky do u feel to be hanging out with us 2 cool chicks tonight"

my responce- "what kind of a stuck up bitch comment was that"

Gazorpazorpfield

My friend talking about guacamole
"I hear it's great and how good it is, but I cant get myself to put it in my mouth"

OPP

"SCORE! Watermelon... awwww god this shit is so dank" *devours*
my friend just now getting over his hangover

Jormungandr

"I squeeze gats til my clipz is empty"

NOCAP

"She smashed Marco?!"

drinkwine732

"It's only sketchy if you're wearing black"

I was on BART, I was scared...

sbs_will

"isnt a blowjob where a girl blows you a kiss?"

-some really stupid kid in my first hour class.

I have no idea if he was serious or not.

NOCAP

"She a tuck and duck that's why everyone knows her cause she be cappin niggaz up."

neweds21

some lady in front of me at jack in the box "Im sure glad the drivethru was closed because I can never get through those tiny things when Im this drunk"

OPP

"Alexander huh? That's a real pretty name"
Some creepy ass cashier at Subway

sbs_will

"can you tell me if my pants are wet?"

"can you feel em?"

-some reaaaaalyy creepy old guy to my friend while standing in line at mcdonalds