Best show of the year. Probably 25/30 people in a small dive bar. People like us. Made some good connections. Probably will be parting with our lead guitarist soon though
So now that FTA is done, at least for the time being. I think my short term goals are going to be: Get a new job so I no longer have to work nights and weekends, revisit and rerecord some old The Draconian Crusade stuff just for fun, black metal side project with FTA drummer, and a side project described as "music for dudes in leather jackets to drink beers and light garbage cans on fire to" also with the FTA drummer.
So it's been a long time coming, but I reached my breaking point at the show Friday.
My lead guitarist joined another band last year. It started a discussion, but he assured us FTA would still be the main priority, and that the other band wouldn't interfere. Unfortunately that hasn't been the case, and he has been prioritizing the other band, and it's been slowly becoming more and more of an issue.
You might remember at the start of this year, we were supposed to play a show at a local venue we like playing at. We were all booked and had publicly announced the show. A few weeks out, my lead guitarist was suddenly like "I cant play this show now, we need to drop it, I will be out of town". We were pissed, but what could we do. So we dropped the show. Turned out he never went out of town, and just didn't want to play the show. So we had a long discussion/argument about it. It ended with my lead reassuring us that he fucked up, he apologized, and said that he still wanted to be in FTA, and would make more of an effort to make sure he made it a priority. So we accepted it and tried moving on.
Couple months pass. We play a few shows. He never promotes our shit, never shares our posts, never invites people to our shows (he does share about his other band, and invites people to their shows). He always seems tired and disinterested at shows. Never brings up practice. Shows up late, leaves early kind of shit. Never contributes financially unless I get on his ass to share the financial responsibility like the rest of us. He would like sit in his car and draw, or sleep instead of hanging out at venues with us and networking. That kinda shit. Animosity really builds up between him and my drummer. He also started to get really lazy, mooching weed off my drummer, and mooching amps from the other bands playing so he didn't have to bring stuff. Stopped bringing his pedal board, etc.
IN JULY WE BOOK THIS SHOW FOR NOVEMBER 10 IN INDIANA. EVERYONE AGREES, WE'RE BOOKED. It's important to note that this show was booked all the way out in JULY.
September starts to roll around, we're offered an out of state Halloween show. My bass player (who has the hardest schedule to work around) says he's available to do it. Bass player, drummer, and I are hyped to finally get a Halloween show. Lead guitarist says "no I can't do it, I'll be recording with the other band that weekend". I'm like "dude FUCK your other band". It turns into a huge argument. We have another argument about things. Guitarist basically says he's burnt out doing both bands, but still wants to be in FTA, however he believes us to be sub-par musicians, and begins to openly say he doesn't like our more metalcore direction, wants to go more death metal, and doesn't like our Contagion EP. Says we need new material to reinvigorate interest, and he's still dedicated to FTA, but asks us to take the month of October off so he can focus on his other band (who practices four times a week vs our one day a week). We agree, because at this point we're having a slow year, and I'm burnt out myself.
I BOOK OUR HOTEL FOR OUR INDIANA SHOW IN MID OCTOBER. Everyone knew about it. I shared the cost of the split for our room. Drummer and bassist paid me, lead guitarist never did.
We end up taking a couple week break, play our show at the end of September, and took the month of October off.
Last weekend: We have practice to finally get together, decide our set for the show, and establish who was going to be driving, and at what times. We have a 45 minute set. We pick some songs, and time it out, and we're only at 30 minutes. So I'm like "we can play some more". My drummer suggests Revelry In The Dark, to which my lead says "no, I dont want to play too many solos". I'm like "what? It's your job to play solos. And besides, we only have one other song in the set currently with a solo in it". So he agrees. I then suggest Contagion, and Light Breaks. Lead says "I dont want to play 7-string songs". I ignore him, and we added Contagion, and Light Breaks. (What this said to me was that he wasn't practicing his solos regularly, and didn't want to worry about playing them at a show).
I say I can drive, but I only have a car so we'd need to take two vehicles. My drummers girlfriend offered to drive (my drummer had just had back surgery, this will come back up). And my drummer is like "Jose (lead guitarist), you have a van, why don't you drive?" And my lead said "Oh, I can't. My car isn't ready to make a drive that long, and I need to bring it to the shop". So we establish I'm driving, and my drummer's girlfriend is tentatively driving. Load in is at 6:30, show time at 8:30. We're the second band playing. So the plan was to leave around 12:00 for a 4 hour drive, get to hotel, check in, get to the venue between 6:30 and 7:00. Call my bassist the next day (because he couldn't make practice the night before), he says he will drive instead of my drummer's girlfriend, and coordinates with my drummer for pickup.
Thursday night, I message everyone "what time are you all planning to meet at my place so we can leave for Indiana". Drummer/bass player say "11 am". My guitarist is suddenly like "actually, I'm not staying overnight in Indy, and I'm driving myself. I'll see you at the show". I'm like "wtf?"
Friday: Drummer, bassist, and I leave at around 12/12:30. We all get to our hotel early, like 5pm. Check in, chill for a bit. Get to the venue around 6:45. Talking to some other bands (two were from Indiana, one from Michigan, all three said that Chicago has the worst music scene ever - exactly what we've been saying), and around 7:30, we're like "has anyone heard from Jose?" So I text him "eta?" Around 8:45 he says "25 mins".
First band is on their last song, I'm pissed off at this point. I pull my bassist and drummer outside, and I'm like "would either of you have any issues with me kicking Jose out after this show?". Drummer says: "nah, fuck him, but lets wait until next practice because I dont want to cause a scene at a show". Bassist says "Lets give him an opportunity to quit first, and then you can kick him out if you want to".
First band finishes, we're literally loading our stuff on stage, and my guitarist finally walks in. Bums a guitar cab off the third band, and we play our set. During our change from 6 to 7 strings, my guitarist tells us he didn't bring a tuner, and we're standing on stage like assholes playing open notes so he can tune by ear. Total amateur hour.
After the show, we're loading out. My drummer just had back surgery, so he can't lift anything heavy. So my bassist, my girlfriend, and my drummer's girlfriend, all take apart his drums, put them in bags, and load them in the cars. My lead didn't lift a finger to help us.
Once back inside, my bassist was paying for our tab at this show. So he offered my lead a drink on his tab. My lead then proceeds to order a fucking burger and fries on my bassist's tab.
Show ends, we all head back to the hotel, my guitarist leaves to go home. He never once says "sorry Im not staying here," "sorry for not helping with the hotel". Nothing. I believe he A. couldn't afford the cut of the hotel, and B. had practice with his other band Saturday morning and he didn't want to be late for it, so he left us early.
End of the day, I'm just sick of disrespect from him, and blatant disinterest he has in our band. He still hasn't shared a thing about our show, hasn't reached out in our group chat. Nothing. So I'm done with him. If he doesn't want to be a part of this, then don't be a part of this. Go be with your other band full time, but stop wasting my time, and stop disrespecting me.
Yeah fuck that dude. FTA clearly wasn't a priority for him. I don't get it though, why tell y'all he's still invested but then act like that? Why not just quit the band?
I agree that it's WAY beyond time to fire him. I will say though, from the way you're describing it, y'all sure did let him get away with a lot of stupid shit. Can't say I'm surprised he kept doing it when y'all don't do anything about it other than argue. I'd consider letting him go as soon as you found out he made up a story only because he didn't want to play a show.
Best of luck regardless though. Don't take that shit going forward.
Comments
https://dragoncorpse.bandcamp.com/track/dragussy
- My lead guitarist joined another band last year. It started a discussion, but he assured us FTA would still be the main priority, and that the other band wouldn't interfere. Unfortunately that hasn't been the case, and he has been prioritizing the other band, and it's been slowly becoming more and more of an issue.
- You might remember at the start of this year, we were supposed to play a show at a local venue we like playing at. We were all booked and had publicly announced the show. A few weeks out, my lead guitarist was suddenly like "I cant play this show now, we need to drop it, I will be out of town". We were pissed, but what could we do. So we dropped the show. Turned out he never went out of town, and just didn't want to play the show. So we had a long discussion/argument about it. It ended with my lead reassuring us that he fucked up, he apologized, and said that he still wanted to be in FTA, and would make more of an effort to make sure he made it a priority. So we accepted it and tried moving on.
- Couple months pass. We play a few shows. He never promotes our shit, never shares our posts, never invites people to our shows (he does share about his other band, and invites people to their shows). He always seems tired and disinterested at shows. Never brings up practice. Shows up late, leaves early kind of shit. Never contributes financially unless I get on his ass to share the financial responsibility like the rest of us. He would like sit in his car and draw, or sleep instead of hanging out at venues with us and networking. That kinda shit. Animosity really builds up between him and my drummer. He also started to get really lazy, mooching weed off my drummer, and mooching amps from the other bands playing so he didn't have to bring stuff. Stopped bringing his pedal board, etc.
- IN JULY WE BOOK THIS SHOW FOR NOVEMBER 10 IN INDIANA. EVERYONE AGREES, WE'RE BOOKED. It's important to note that this show was booked all the way out in JULY.
- September starts to roll around, we're offered an out of state Halloween show. My bass player (who has the hardest schedule to work around) says he's available to do it. Bass player, drummer, and I are hyped to finally get a Halloween show. Lead guitarist says "no I can't do it, I'll be recording with the other band that weekend". I'm like "dude FUCK your other band". It turns into a huge argument. We have another argument about things. Guitarist basically says he's burnt out doing both bands, but still wants to be in FTA, however he believes us to be sub-par musicians, and begins to openly say he doesn't like our more metalcore direction, wants to go more death metal, and doesn't like our Contagion EP. Says we need new material to reinvigorate interest, and he's still dedicated to FTA, but asks us to take the month of October off so he can focus on his other band (who practices four times a week vs our one day a week). We agree, because at this point we're having a slow year, and I'm burnt out myself.
- I BOOK OUR HOTEL FOR OUR INDIANA SHOW IN MID OCTOBER. Everyone knew about it. I shared the cost of the split for our room. Drummer and bassist paid me, lead guitarist never did.
- We end up taking a couple week break, play our show at the end of September, and took the month of October off.
- Last weekend: We have practice to finally get together, decide our set for the show, and establish who was going to be driving, and at what times. We have a 45 minute set. We pick some songs, and time it out, and we're only at 30 minutes. So I'm like "we can play some more". My drummer suggests Revelry In The Dark, to which my lead says "no, I dont want to play too many solos". I'm like "what? It's your job to play solos. And besides, we only have one other song in the set currently with a solo in it". So he agrees. I then suggest Contagion, and Light Breaks. Lead says "I dont want to play 7-string songs". I ignore him, and we added Contagion, and Light Breaks. (What this said to me was that he wasn't practicing his solos regularly, and didn't want to worry about playing them at a show).
- I say I can drive, but I only have a car so we'd need to take two vehicles. My drummers girlfriend offered to drive (my drummer had just had back surgery, this will come back up). And my drummer is like "Jose (lead guitarist), you have a van, why don't you drive?" And my lead said "Oh, I can't. My car isn't ready to make a drive that long, and I need to bring it to the shop". So we establish I'm driving, and my drummer's girlfriend is tentatively driving. Load in is at 6:30, show time at 8:30. We're the second band playing. So the plan was to leave around 12:00 for a 4 hour drive, get to hotel, check in, get to the venue between 6:30 and 7:00. Call my bassist the next day (because he couldn't make practice the night before), he says he will drive instead of my drummer's girlfriend, and coordinates with my drummer for pickup.
- Thursday night, I message everyone "what time are you all planning to meet at my place so we can leave for Indiana". Drummer/bass player say "11 am". My guitarist is suddenly like "actually, I'm not staying overnight in Indy, and I'm driving myself. I'll see you at the show". I'm like "wtf?"
- Friday: Drummer, bassist, and I leave at around 12/12:30. We all get to our hotel early, like 5pm. Check in, chill for a bit. Get to the venue around 6:45. Talking to some other bands (two were from Indiana, one from Michigan, all three said that Chicago has the worst music scene ever - exactly what we've been saying), and around 7:30, we're like "has anyone heard from Jose?" So I text him "eta?" Around 8:45 he says "25 mins".
- First band is on their last song, I'm pissed off at this point. I pull my bassist and drummer outside, and I'm like "would either of you have any issues with me kicking Jose out after this show?". Drummer says: "nah, fuck him, but lets wait until next practice because I dont want to cause a scene at a show". Bassist says "Lets give him an opportunity to quit first, and then you can kick him out if you want to".
- First band finishes, we're literally loading our stuff on stage, and my guitarist finally walks in. Bums a guitar cab off the third band, and we play our set. During our change from 6 to 7 strings, my guitarist tells us he didn't bring a tuner, and we're standing on stage like assholes playing open notes so he can tune by ear. Total amateur hour.
- After the show, we're loading out. My drummer just had back surgery, so he can't lift anything heavy. So my bassist, my girlfriend, and my drummer's girlfriend, all take apart his drums, put them in bags, and load them in the cars. My lead didn't lift a finger to help us.
- Once back inside, my bassist was paying for our tab at this show. So he offered my lead a drink on his tab. My lead then proceeds to order a fucking burger and fries on my bassist's tab.
- Show ends, we all head back to the hotel, my guitarist leaves to go home. He never once says "sorry Im not staying here," "sorry for not helping with the hotel". Nothing. I believe he A. couldn't afford the cut of the hotel, and B. had practice with his other band Saturday morning and he didn't want to be late for it, so he left us early.
End of the day, I'm just sick of disrespect from him, and blatant disinterest he has in our band. He still hasn't shared a thing about our show, hasn't reached out in our group chat. Nothing. So I'm done with him. If he doesn't want to be a part of this, then don't be a part of this. Go be with your other band full time, but stop wasting my time, and stop disrespecting me.Best of luck regardless though. Don't take that shit going forward.