Youre gonna have to man up and take control of your life at some point MC. The only reason question is how long will it take for you to do it. It could be tomorrow or it could be 10 years down the road. Or one day you wake up and youre Catz.The time you waste between now and when it finally happens you never get back though.
And I have the rest of my life in check. Im doin school, getting good grades, doin some music projects, trying to get internships, working, finally have a friend group I can hang with regularly down here, and still have time for gaming/anime. So...
And I have the rest of my life in check. Im doin school, getting good grades, doin some music projects, trying to get internships, working, finally have a friend group I can hang with regularly down here, and still have time for gaming/anime. So...
Congratulations, you have everything you could ever want
And I have the rest of my life in check. Im doin school, getting good grades, doin some music projects, trying to get internships, working, finally have a friend group I can hang with regularly down here, and still have time for gaming/anime. So...
Congratulations, you have everything you could ever want
Almost
I wouldn't go that far. But I don't just sit around like people here make it out to be.
Yeah actual love is when you feel that way about someone, and they feel that way back. )
idk, I think MC might be more right on this one. I think it's complicated.
When I consider my kids, that's probably the strongest feeling of love I've ever had and that wouldnt change even if they stopped loving me. Like I'll love my kids until the day I die, no matter what.
However when I consider women, Im not sure I'd consider one sided feelings (like I said above) love. If I had strong love feelings for a girl, and she didn't return those feelings, I'd question if I was actually in love or if it was just lust. I think it might be possible to have a one sided love like MC said, but the line between love and lust is too blurry to really know for sure. I think the only way to know for sure is to cut off all contact with that person, wait like 3 years, and then reflect on how you really felt about them.
As a friend, I think its ok to take her back and go "hey, really think about what you are doing. Is this what you really want?" Looking out for your friends' best interest is what it means to be a friend.
Do you have any idea what consent is when talking about cases of date-rape? (this is related, ill bring it back). Being too drunk to consent so it's rape is not "I had a few drinks your honor and then he took advantage of me as I took his pants off and rode his dick". No, that's not rape. Date rape is literally "I was so drunk I could barely move or speak and he had sex with me". Now to pull this back because I'm not suggesting you are worried about rape.... Alcohol doesn't make people do things they dont want to do. If she is willingly stripping in front of you, it isnt because of alcohol, but because she wanted to do it. It might give her a little more courage because she's feeling drunk and good, but if she's taking off her clothes it's because she wants too. In this scenario, you wouldnt be taking advantage of her.... You'd be living in the moment and taking the relationship to the next level which you are too chicken shit to do. grow a pair. If I ever hear she was going to strip in front of you and you "did the right thing" and stopped her, I swear to god im going to end your life for you.
As a friend, I think its ok to take her back and go "hey, really think about what you are doing. Is this what you really want?" Looking out for your friends' best interest is what it means to be a friend.
Do you have any idea what consent is when talking about cases of date-rape? (this is related, ill bring it back). Being too drunk to consent so it's rape is not "I had a few drinks your honor and then he took advantage of me as I took his pants off and rode his dick". No, that's not rape. Date rape is literally "I was so drunk I could barely move or speak and he had sex with me". Now to pull this back because I'm not suggesting you are worried about rape.... Alcohol doesn't make people do things they dont want to do. If she is willingly stripping in front of you, it isnt because of alcohol, but because she wanted to do it. It might give her a little more courage because she's feeling drunk and good, but if she's taking off her clothes it's because she wants too. In this scenario, you wouldnt be taking advantage of her.... You'd be living in the moment and taking the relationship to the next level which you are too chicken shit to do. grow a pair. If I ever hear she was going to strip in front of you and you "did the right thing" and stopped her, I swear to god im going to end your life for you.
You'd have to kill me then. I really dont think said scenario will happen, because she never comes off that way, and I really just think its her being funny. But you bet your ass Id stop her and tell her to think about what shes doing.
You'd have to kill me then. I really dont think said scenario will happen, because she never comes off that way, and I really just think its her being funny. But you bet your ass Id stop her and tell her to think about what shes doing.
It may not be rape, but its taking advantage.
I agree that scenario probably wont ever happen. She wouldn't do that unless she was super into you that way, and I think you've made it clear you don't want that with her.
But more importantly - No it is 100% not taking advantage. Alcohol doesn't make you do anything you don't want to do. You can't be taking advantage of someone that had a few drinks and willingly wants to strip in front of you. The alcohol isnt making her do that, you arent making her do that, she wants to do that. All the alcohol might do is give her the courage to do something she wanted to do.
It's like being shy to talk to a girl at a bar, then you have a few drinks and all of a sudden now have more courage to go though with it. It's not like you didn't want to talk with the girl before the drinks, you just just didn't have the courage to do so. After a few drinks you're feeling more up to what you wanted to do. This stripping scenario is the same thing... If she were to do that, it would be because she wants to, and the drinks gave her the courage to go though with it....That's not taking advantage of a situation, it's living in the moment and enjoying life. And FUck your life if you stop that.
No, its taking advantage. If she really wanted to do that, she could do it sober. Alcohol fucks with your mind and warps your perception of things. I lose a lot of restraint when I drink. I look back at it when I'm sober and think "man I shouldn't have done that".
If she was to get drunk and strip in front of me, the next day she'd probably be like "yea that was a bad idea". If she really wanted to do that, she could do it sober.
And idk what you mean by "and I think you've made it clear you don't want that with her"?
I think I've made it clear she's the only girl for me. If you mean that I don't want sex with no relationship, then you're right. But I do want to date her.
And idk what you mean by "and I think you've made it clear you don't want that with her"?
I think I've made it clear she's the only girl for me. If you mean that I don't want sex with no relationship, then you're right. But I do want to date her.
You might have said it by your words, but I've grown to think that your body language tells her a different story. You might be saying you want to "be with her" but you treat her too much as a friend to get it to progress further. That's probably why she broke up with you when you guys did date... because you were more like a friend then a bf.
Sure maybe all this isnt true. But just based on what you tell us, I think a large part of the blame of her not being interested in you is solely on you.
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Just not when it comes to dating. Which at this point, I don't care if I become Catz single.
Congratulations, you have everything you could ever want
Almost
When I consider my kids, that's probably the strongest feeling of love I've ever had and that wouldnt change even if they stopped loving me. Like I'll love my kids until the day I die, no matter what.
However when I consider women, Im not sure I'd consider one sided feelings (like I said above) love. If I had strong love feelings for a girl, and she didn't return those feelings, I'd question if I was actually in love or if it was just lust. I think it might be possible to have a one sided love like MC said, but the line between love and lust is too blurry to really know for sure. I think the only way to know for sure is to cut off all contact with that person, wait like 3 years, and then reflect on how you really felt about them.
It may not be rape, but its taking advantage.
But more importantly - No it is 100% not taking advantage. Alcohol doesn't make you do anything you don't want to do. You can't be taking advantage of someone that had a few drinks and willingly wants to strip in front of you. The alcohol isnt making her do that, you arent making her do that, she wants to do that. All the alcohol might do is give her the courage to do something she wanted to do.
It's like being shy to talk to a girl at a bar, then you have a few drinks and all of a sudden now have more courage to go though with it. It's not like you didn't want to talk with the girl before the drinks, you just just didn't have the courage to do so. After a few drinks you're feeling more up to what you wanted to do. This stripping scenario is the same thing... If she were to do that, it would be because she wants to, and the drinks gave her the courage to go though with it....That's not taking advantage of a situation, it's living in the moment and enjoying life. And FUck your life if you stop that.
If she was to get drunk and strip in front of me, the next day she'd probably be like "yea that was a bad idea". If she really wanted to do that, she could do it sober.
I think I've made it clear she's the only girl for me. If you mean that I don't want sex with no relationship, then you're right. But I do want to date her.
Sure maybe all this isnt true. But just based on what you tell us, I think a large part of the blame of her not being interested in you is solely on you.