Post your favorite quotes that someone said something you said or something you overheard today

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Dude, i think i filled the cup.

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That akward moment where your pulling weeds for someone and your hand almost lands on a frog orgy that you didnt notice as you were reaching out to pull some weedsand they both hop away attached to each other.. Mother nature you are fine as hell but sometimes you are one strange bitch -.-

Necrothulhu

Distance said:

Customer walks up to me at SELF checkout dragging a huge box

"Can you self check me out here?"
<_________> no

And I'm stuck on it for another 5 hours kill meeeeeee

How the fuck are people so stupid?

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First you get an egg and then you get a slut and then you take the egg and you put it in her butt, and then you fill her up with her favorite kind of meat, then you warm it up and know it's time to eat.

Rex_Capone420

I had one guy ask me " are your burritos still 3 dollars?" To which I responded " no sir the special is over they are now 4 dollars" he said" ok ill take one of those." if your were gonna get it either way why ask

Xeno

Yeah screw him for wanting to know how much money he was going to spend

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TheNobleFaceHumper said:

First you get an egg and then you get a slut and then you take the egg and you put it in her butt, and then you fill her up with her favorite kind of meat, then you warm it up and know it's time to eat.

These are lyrics to a local band here called the "Abortion Twins" lol

FIRENATHANIELHACKETT

No one cares.

jag

Teh_Rutabaga said:

No one cares.

Stfu his scene is thriving and this further proves his claim. Jelly on your donut brah.

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Lol.

Up until two days ago I didn't even know they existed, and yes they do suck.

Necrothulhu

Hey, Bianca's favorite movie came out *points to Snitch* - Marc

drinkwine732

CthulhuPuffs said:

Hey, Bianca's favorite movie came out *points to Snitch* - Marc

Referring to online people in your daily lives #-o

Necrothulhu

So?

1D_for_life

drinkwine732 said:

CthulhuPuffs said:

Hey, Bianca's favorite movie came out *points to Snitch* - Marc

Referring to online people in your daily lives #-o

Was about to say this.

Necrothulhu

So two people from the forum making jokes irl can't mention anything about internet people from the exact place they both post at? Well ok then

KridesBrideBritt

Me: Tell Roger (my brother) that dinner's ready.
Nina (my sister): Roger! Dark Vader is here!
Me: Darth Vader.
Nina: What?
Me: It's Darth Vader. Not Dark Vader.
Nina: No. He's on the dark side. Dark Vader.
Me: No. It's Darth. D-A-R-T-H.
Nina: You're wrong.
Me: Nope. Trust me.
Nina: But that makes no sense! It's stupid!

We have failed my little sister.

JLRedWing13

#-O

drinkwine732

KridesBrideBritt said:

Me: Tell Roger (my brother) that dinner's ready.
Nina (my sister): Roger! Dark Vader is here!
Me: Darth Vader.
Nina: What?
Me: It's Darth Vader. Not Dark Vader.
Nina: No. He's on the dark side. Dark Vader.
Me: No. It's Darth. D-A-R-T-H.
Nina: You're wrong.
Me: Nope. Trust me.
Nina: But that makes no sense! It's stupid!

We have failed my little sister.

Search your feelings, Nina. You know it to be true.

KridesBrideBritt

The kid refuses to watch Star Wars. :-<

Tiger

I was just curious as to how she gets Dark-Darth Vader, out of "dinner"??