"RYAN DUNN...R.I.P. tonight my wife and i attended the los angeles memorial for ryan and it was the saddest 3 hours of my life. knoxville got up on the mic and broke down, as did steve-o, jeff tremaine and trip taylor among others. to see these guys that were always cracking up and doing ridiculous stunts and pranks and always laughing...taking nothing seriously...breaking down and shedding tears, was enough to make me lose it as well. i wanted to get up to the mic and speak, but i couldnt get the guts. the main reason for that was that ryan dunn was a very close friend of mine from 1995-2001. i was never interested in him as an entertainer... only a friend, so i felt kind of out of place at the memorial. one of my best friends, aaron ashcraft, if i remember correctly was the first to meet him. they were trying to start a band or something. ryan knew i could play guitar a little bit and he said to me in a very serious but joking tone, "i dont have any talent, do i". we hung out at his house a lot and then he got this small apartment with a creepy roommate and we would watch Monty Python all the time which was one of his favorite things. Musically he was somewhat of a Life of Agony fan, but he randomly idolized Keith Caputo and his solo records. Keith's albums were never released in the united states, so i did my best to explain to him why Keith's solo cd cost him $30...Dunn asked me, "why did i have to spend $30 on this cd?"...well because it was a european import. he didnt understand. his frustration and anger always made us both laugh. i dont want to sugarcoat ryan's life and not mention the fact that he was indeed, without a doubt, a reckless driver. as april margera has stated as well as bam, he was a "fast junkie". he flipped a car in late '95 with bam, chris raab and jess margera in the car with him on 202N. the car landed on 202S. Jess was thrown from the car several feet and bam thought he was dead. jess broke some bones but everyone else was ok thank god. ryan went to the junkyard and had pictures taken of him and the totalled car. from that point, i was afraid to be a passenger in Ryan's car. in the 16 years that i have known him, i only got in a car with him once...and we were on windy roads with sharp turns and i begged him to slow down. he loved cars, he loved acceleration, he loved speed...he thought it was impressive. .
I pretty much lost him when i moved to LA, but i still hung out with him 5-6 times a year afterwards when id go back east to visit. He always greeted me with a bear hug. he was ALWAYS smiling, no matter what hell he was going through. he was depressed a lot and hid it well. we did not talk about Jackass. we never talked about the CKY videos. we had a personal relationship that involved very long and interesting conversations, and we told eachother everything no matter how personal. we supported eachother in our struggles against substance abuse, we talked about all the great and funny stuff we did in the mid 90's when he moved from ohio to west chester, PA. Foreign Objects fans may know that Jess and I asked him to pose as a member of the band in a photo, so that magazines and the "metal media" would think we were a full band when we really were not. he loved the idea. i seriously think that was the first photo ever taken of ryan in west chester and it was included in the 2 cd set of FO's Universal Culture Shock. Ryan would do anything for his buddies. If i had a problem with my car, hed come over and fix it while telling me extremely exaggerated stories of what he was up to and what was going on with his life. he had so many ambitions before he hit it big with Jackass. he was very into car repair and i remember him telling me that he wanted to open a shop...or maybe he told me that he DID open a shop. we were all broke back then, and we would entertain eachother with many different ideas and ambitions that would ultimately never materialize. Ryan never had a negative word to say about anyone. i noticed that a lot because i would try to get him going...i'd try to gossip with him...doesnt this dude suck, aint this guy a prick...he never dignified shit talk with a response. He loved us all, and thats what makes his passing so goddamn unfair. of course the media had a field day with his blood alcohol level but i dont think the accident that killed him and zach was caused by that. ryan could hold his liquor and drove for years under the influence. we all did. the road he we speeding down at 130 mph, is notorious for deer leaping out of nowhere. i can pretty much guarantee that a deer jumped out of the woods, and in front of his car and he swerved to avoid hitting it and that is what caused this accident. i still cant believe that he is...gone. in my 35 years, i have been lucky enough until now to never lose a close friend. so i am no good at this. Ryan's not gone, hes gonna show up at The Note with his white t-shirt, blue jeans and ridiculous beard and offer to buy me a drink. And we'll complain about our girls, our strange careers, and we'll laugh about all of it...because if there's anything i have learned from ryan, its that no matter how bad shit gets, its still funny, so fuck it. This is what i wish i had said tonight at the memorial...but i knew the tears would come out much quicker than the words. i feel so helpless, i feel bad for bam...i wish he was easier to get in touch with. i want to be there for him. i want to hug April and Phil...i will never get over this, ever. i will always remember his sense of humor, his stature, his ambition, his white lies, his exaggeration, his bad hygiene, his strong desire to get everyone back together...especially raab and dico...and how much he appreciated where and what he ended up doing with his life...arguably the greatest Jackass, and even more a remarkable and unreplaceable REAL friend. i could go on and on but i decided the jist of it would be enough. Ryan i will miss you when i visit home, i can't imagine you not showing up for a gig or a get-together...i can't wrap my head around the fact that you no longer exist in human form, but i know youre in heaven...and eventually we will all be reunited. I love you deron"
ryan could hold his liquor and drove for years under the influence. we all did. the road he we speeding down at 130 mph, is notorious for deer leaping out of nowhere. i can pretty much guarantee that a deer jumped out of the woods, and in front of his car and he swerved to avoid hitting it and that is what caused this accident.
<_> cmon dood, admit that he fucked up, dont blame a deer....
Comments
I pretty much lost him when i moved to LA, but i still hung out with him 5-6 times a year afterwards when id go back east to visit. He always greeted me with a bear hug. he was ALWAYS smiling, no matter what hell he was going through. he was depressed a lot and hid it well. we did not talk about Jackass. we never talked about the CKY videos. we had a personal relationship that involved very long and interesting conversations, and we told eachother everything no matter how personal. we supported eachother in our struggles against substance abuse, we talked about all the great and funny stuff we did in the mid 90's when he moved from ohio to west chester, PA. Foreign Objects fans may know that Jess and I asked him to pose as a member of the band in a photo, so that magazines and the "metal media" would think we were a full band when we really were not. he loved the idea. i seriously think that was the first photo ever taken of ryan in west chester and it was included in the 2 cd set of FO's Universal Culture Shock. Ryan would do anything for his buddies. If i had a problem with my car, hed come over and fix it while telling me extremely exaggerated stories of what he was up to and what was going on with his life. he had so many ambitions before he hit it big with Jackass. he was very into car repair and i remember him telling me that he wanted to open a shop...or maybe he told me that he DID open a shop. we were all broke back then, and we would entertain eachother with many different ideas and ambitions that would ultimately never materialize. Ryan never had a negative word to say about anyone. i noticed that a lot because i would try to get him going...i'd try to gossip with him...doesnt this dude suck, aint this guy a prick...he never dignified shit talk with a response. He loved us all, and thats what makes his passing so goddamn unfair. of course the media had a field day with his blood alcohol level but i dont think the accident that killed him and zach was caused by that. ryan could hold his liquor and drove for years under the influence. we all did. the road he we speeding down at 130 mph, is notorious for deer leaping out of nowhere. i can pretty much guarantee that a deer jumped out of the woods, and in front of his car and he swerved to avoid hitting it and that is what caused this accident. i still cant believe that he is...gone. in my 35 years, i have been lucky enough until now to never lose a close friend. so i am no good at this. Ryan's not gone, hes gonna show up at The Note with his white t-shirt, blue jeans and ridiculous beard and offer to buy me a drink. And we'll complain about our girls, our strange careers, and we'll laugh about all of it...because if there's anything i have learned from ryan, its that no matter how bad shit gets, its still funny, so fuck it. This is what i wish i had said tonight at the memorial...but i knew the tears would come out much quicker than the words. i feel so helpless, i feel bad for bam...i wish he was easier to get in touch with. i want to be there for him. i want to hug April and Phil...i will never get over this, ever. i will always remember his sense of humor, his stature, his ambition, his white lies, his exaggeration, his bad hygiene, his strong desire to get everyone back together...especially raab and dico...and how much he appreciated where and what he ended up doing with his life...arguably the greatest Jackass, and even more a remarkable and unreplaceable REAL friend. i could go on and on but i decided the jist of it would be enough. Ryan i will miss you when i visit home, i can't imagine you not showing up for a gig or a get-together...i can't wrap my head around the fact that you no longer exist in human form, but i know youre in heaven...and eventually we will all be reunited.
I love you
deron"
0 fucks
<_> cmon dood, admit that he fucked up, dont blame a deer....