Long distance takes so much trust. I tried to trust him. If I hadn't found this stuff myself, who's knows how long it would have lasted. I truly feel bad for the other girl. theyve been together longer than him and I have..
I truly feel bad for the other girl. theyve been together longer than him and I have.. except she didn't have his child. I'm so back and forth with emotions. He's such a fucking asshole
This. She didnt have a child, so don't feel bad for her. When you have kids with a person, you are making a commitment to each other to help raise another person together. It goes beyond just having a broken heart. So fuck feeling bad for her... He did a greater injustice to you- fucking bullshit. You dont deserve that.
The question is- if he does choose you? Can you forgive and learn to trust again? And if he does do that, what is your plan for ending the long distance relationship? That seems like it is important... no?
He needs some fucking help. There is obviously something wrong with him. And I told him, if he wants to be with me , shit is gonna change. I want to hate him soooo bad wake. But I don't. I just hope he tells the other girl soon . If he doesn't .. then I'll know how he really feels and I'll be like " well thanks for the sperm donation, I'll be loving those checks foe the next 18 yrs"
WakeOfAshesPosts: 21,665destroyer of motherfuckers
edited December 2012
I know this isnt a popular opinion, however I understand why guys and girls cheat. Im not saying that it isnt hurtful to the people they cheat on, but I understand it. And at some level I do think it is possible to reconcile and work together to make sure this sort of thing doesnt tear you apart nor happen again in the future.
However it's clear that ground rules are going to need to be discussed and set before things continue. You're right in saying that he needs to tell her soon, and whatever you do, do not budge on that. I'd give him 2 days tops.
I know a girl who had a kid with a guy. She loved the guy but he loved someone else... so he moved to canada to live with her. Every now and then he comes back to "visit the kid" which always turns into 1 minute of visitation with the kid and then a night of booty call followed by "Baby... I love you and I am going to end my relationship with that other chick. I am going to move in with you. I just need to time it with my lease. When my lease is up I will move out and break things off with her". He has been saying that for the last 10 years. So yeah... fuck that. That dude will never be with this chick other than a booty call.
This makes me even more paranoid than i already am
I think that is a natural feeling, and is one of the reason why long distance relationships are so hard. It also makes it hard because when a guy is in a relationship, it seems like every girl wants to fuck him. Im not really sure why that is. Perhaps the other women see that he is up for commitment and they are drawn to that? But yeah- not a lot you can do in a long distance relationship other than try and put those sort of thoughts out of your head and work on closing the distance.
It does seem crazy that you were the other women and he had a kid with you. Like WTF is his deal? When that happened he should have realized he had a choice to make.
Honestly I really dont understand how a guy can carry on to full fledged relationships. I dont even have enough time for one.
Really sucks that you have to go through this monicaa. Especially right before christmas. Whenever anyone tells me they dont have a fb account I just call them a liar right then and there. Perhaps they arent active on fb, but everyone has one.
My advice. Don't talk to him for a little while. Let everything calm down and just focus on your kids. When you feel ready to talk to him again, do it. Just try and gather your thoughts so you know exactly what to say. I'm so sorry to hear this happened. In my opinion the fucker deserves no pity. That's just me though, in the end I hope everything works out for you. >:D<
The people that wanted to go couldn't go. Everyone else didn't want to take me even with gas money. I should have just never bought it in the first place
Comments
The question is- if he does choose you? Can you forgive and learn to trust again? And if he does do that, what is your plan for ending the long distance relationship? That seems like it is important... no?
However it's clear that ground rules are going to need to be discussed and set before things continue. You're right in saying that he needs to tell her soon, and whatever you do, do not budge on that. I'd give him 2 days tops.
I know a girl who had a kid with a guy. She loved the guy but he loved someone else... so he moved to canada to live with her. Every now and then he comes back to "visit the kid" which always turns into 1 minute of visitation with the kid and then a night of booty call followed by "Baby... I love you and I am going to end my relationship with that other chick. I am going to move in with you. I just need to time it with my lease. When my lease is up I will move out and break things off with her". He has been saying that for the last 10 years. So yeah... fuck that. That dude will never be with this chick other than a booty call.
No shit