I don't blame you for wanting to work it out...i just know i never could
Why? lets hypothetically say you have the ultimate babe- You love everything about her and every second you are together it's like the best time of your life. You find out she got drunk and fucked some dude. That's it? You couldnt forgive her for that? I mean it's not like she was some virgin before you met and you were staking your flag in her vagina. No... It wasn't a problem that she was with other dudes before you, but because she got caught up in a moment you'd throw away any potential future you might have had with her? Im not saying the act wouldnt hurt, and im not saying your trust wouldnt be ruined... but If you cared for her that much before hand, why wouldnt you at least hear her out and try and come up with some plan for her to regain your trust? Seems like if she did want to win your forgiveness, then being with her and rebuilding trust issues seems like a better alternative to telling her to piss off.
I understand wanting it because of the child. I Just know if it was me that i would never be able to have a healthy relationship after the trust is broken...and if it can't be a healthy relationship for sure would not be healthy for the child. I really do hope it works out for you, you seemed so happy, i didn't have a child with the girl i dated that was married but i still remember what it was like when her husband called me....i felt horribly sick for days...i hope you get threw it as fast as possible Monicaaaaaaa
I don't blame you for wanting to work it out...i just know i never could
Why? lets hypothetically say you have the ultimate babe- You love everything about her and every second you are together it's like the best time of your life. You find out she got drunk and fucked some dude. That's it? You couldnt forgive her for that? I mean it's not like she was some virgin before you met and you were staking your flag in her vagina. No... It wasn't a problem that she was with other dudes before you, but because she got caught up in a moment you'd throw away any potential future you might have had with her? Im not saying the act wouldnt hurt, and im not saying your trust wouldnt be ruined... but If you cared for her that much before hand, why wouldnt you at least hear her out and try and come up with some plan for her to regain your trust? Seems like if she did want to win your forgiveness, then being with her and rebuilding trust issues seems like a better alternative to telling her to piss off.
I see what your saying...and i could see why people would be able to work it out, and i guess its not entirely impossible. I just know if that happened i would become a jealous mess. I am not a jealous person at all, but if i feel insecure in a relationship i would become jealous, and an asshole lol. I would feel like i wasn't good enough, and i would not feel like i could let her go anywhere and have anything to drink after this happened...and this would probably grow into paranoia and id start wanting to smell her breath when she got home, and id probably always be checking in on her, it just wouldn't be healthy for me or anyone else. Im not saying its not possible, just in past experiences im pretty sure it wouldn't work for me
I have never found a relationship where i had the amazing connection your talking about though. I mean i have really like/loved the women iv been with. Iv just never had that connection that i feel like this is the person that im going to be with forever. If i had that with someone and then they cheated on me its possible i could be blinded by love...wouldn't be the first time
WakeOfAshesPosts: 21,665destroyer of motherfuckers
Yeah I can understand you saying that and I can understand you having that opinion. I don't think that position is a bad one to have, and who knows, perhaps I might have the same opinion if I were in that situation. I like to think that if I ever was in that situation I would avoid making rash decisions, give it a little time to collect my feelings, and consider both the positive and negative aspects of the decision "Should I break up with her". I may not always make the best or right decision, but I like to do my best at making the most informed decision based more on logic and less on in the moment feelings.
Yeah I can understand you saying that and I can understand you having that opinion. I don't think that position is a bad one to have, and who knows, perhaps I might have the same opinion if I were in that situation. I like to think that if I ever was in that situation I would avoid making rash decisions, give it a little time to collect my feelings, and consider both the positive and negative aspects of the decision "Should I break up with her". I may not always make the best or right decision, but I like to do my best at making the most informed decision based more on logic and less on in the moment feelings.
Oh for sure. I try to go threw life without making any rash decisions. I try and weigh the positive and negatives to everything. I am constantly asking myself why i feel this way rather then just crying about it. I just mean more then likely i would not be able to continue a healthy relationship. But its not my right to have an opinion on what monica should do herself, a child would almost certainly change my mind set as well. I was just offering up how i would/have felt.
I had to purchase a third textbook that I don't need from this one site, because the two I needed were so cheap I couldn't get free shipping on just those two.....
Wake, has your wife cheated on you? You dont have to answer, I've just never heard someone say "yeah, if my significant other cheated, i'd forgive them" However if youve been through that experience and found it in your heart to forgive her i'd obviously understand your position on the matter.
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I see what your saying...and i could see why people would be able to work it out, and i guess its not entirely impossible. I just know if that happened i would become a jealous mess. I am not a jealous person at all, but if i feel insecure in a relationship i would become jealous, and an asshole lol. I would feel like i wasn't good enough, and i would not feel like i could let her go anywhere and have anything to drink after this happened...and this would probably grow into paranoia and id start wanting to smell her breath when she got home, and id probably always be checking in on her, it just wouldn't be healthy for me or anyone else. Im not saying its not possible, just in past experiences im pretty sure it wouldn't work for me
smoke a joint....you will feel better