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THE LEGEND OF TUFFY McRUFFNUTS

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  • GULCH_OF_ROTGULCH_OF_ROT Posts: 5,795 salt miner
    "OMBABMA WADA WALAL DO TO TADA GOTTATATA!!!" THE MONKEY CREATURE YELLS OUT MID CHARGE. "YOUR IN AMERICA NOW YOU AFRO
    SCALP EATING BASTARD WE SPEAK MOTHER FUCKING ENGLISH" TUFFY BARKS BACK. 2 AIDS INFESTED SCALPS WIZZ BY TUFFY'S HEAD,
    MONKEY BOY AND TUFFY'S FOOTING IS SHAKEY AT BEST AS TANK THE BEHEMOTH CONSUMES EVERY THING IN ITS PATH WHILE CHARGING
    THROUGH THE MANSION. TUFFY PULLS OUT HIS TRUSTY CRACK PIPE TAKES A HUGE HIT AND HURLS IT AT MONKEY BOY. IT NAILS HIM
    RIGHT IN THE FOREHEAD, STUNNED MONKEY BOY TRYS TO REPOSITION HIM SELF, TO LATE TUFFY USES HIS CAP LOCK KEY LIKE A
    SICKLE AND SLICES DEEP IN TO MONKEY'S AKILIES TENDON . THE CREATURES YELPS AND FALLS BACK ONTO THE BEHEMOTH TUFFY
    JUMPS ON TOP OF HIM AND GORES HIS THROUT WITH THE J.D. BOTTLE TUFFY PROCEEDS TO CUT THROUGH THE SPINE WITH THE BROKEN
    J.D. BOTTL UNTIL MONKEY'S HEAD IS REMOVED AND THEN AMPUTATES HIS LEFT HAND. TUFFY SEES A NEAR BY STAIR CASE AND JUMPS
    ON TO IT. TANK CONTINUES ITS RAMPAGE HOWLING OUT "HUNGRY HUNGRY!!" FADING AS TUFFY ASCENDS THE STAIRS WITH THE HEAD
    AND HAND TIED TO HIS J.D. HOLSTER.


    TO BE CONTINUED......
  • GULCH_OF_ROTGULCH_OF_ROT Posts: 5,795 salt miner
    ON THE 4TH FLOOR THERE IS A LARGE BLAST DOOR WITH A RETINA SCAN UNIT TUFFY DANGLES THE DECAPITATED HEAD IN FRONT OF IT
    "ACCESS GRANTED" A DIGITAL VOICES SAYS. THE BLAST DOOR SLIDE OPEN TUFFY CHARGES INTO THE NEXT ROOM IT IS SOME KIND OF
    MAIN CONTROL ROOM FOR THE MANSION. THERE IS LITTLE PUDDLES OF HALF DIGESTED FETUS EVERY WHERE. TUFFY KNEELS DOWN AND
    TOUCHES THE PUKE STILL WARM OPRAH MUST BE NEAR BY. THERE IS ONLY ONE OTHER EXIT AT THE REAR OF THE ROOM IT IS AN
    ELEVATOR HE HOPS ON AND HEADS TO THE ROOF. EXITING THE ELEVATOR HE SEES OPRAH AND TO HIS SURPRISE SATAN STANDING
    TOGETHER WAITING FOR THE CHOPPER THAT HOVERING IN FOR A SET DOWN. TUFFY PULLS THE MONKEY HEAD FREE AND HURLS IT AT OPRAH
    SHE TURNS OPENS HER MOUTH AND CONSUMES THE HEAD IN ONE BIT. SATAN LOOKS AT TUFFY TURNS RUNS AND JUMPS OFF THE ROOF OF
    THE MANSION. OPRAH'S MINIONS BEGIN THE LOADING PROCESS OF GETTING OPRAH ONTO THE CHOPPER. 2 GUARDS OPEN FIRE ON TUFFY
    HE DIVES FOR COVER AND PULLS HIS WEAPONS OUT. TUFFY CHARGES THE CHOPPER LUNGES ONTO OPRAH VICIOUSLY HACKING INTO OPRAHS
    FATTY LAYERS. OPRAH HOWLS AND SWINGS ITS ARMS WILDLY TUFFY DRIVES HIS J.D. INTO THE BASE OF OPRAHS NECK AND STARTS
    POUNDING ON IT WITH THE CAPS KEY. IT KEEPS SINKING DEEPER AND DEEPER THROUGH MANY LAYERS OF FAT AND FLESH. AT THIS
    POINT TUFFY AS TAKEN MANY GUN SHOT WOUNDS HE FEELS NOTHING FOR THE ANGEL DUST IS STILL IN HIS SYSTEM. FINALLY HE HITS
    SPINE HE DRIVES THE CAPS LOCK KEY INTO THE HOLE HOOKS IT AROUND THE SPINE TWIST AND PULLS OPRAH HEAD FALLS LIMP.
    TUFFY JUMPS OFF OPRAH AND SLAUGHTERS THE THREE GUARDS AND THE CHOPPER PILOT. STANDING THERE BLEEDING OUT AND UNSURE
    OF WHAT TO DO NEXT.


    TO BE CONTINUED......
  • GULCH_OF_ROTGULCH_OF_ROT Posts: 5,795 salt miner
    STANDING ON THAT ROOF TOP BLEEDING OUT AND NOT CARING ANY MORE THE DECEIVER FINALLY EXTINGUISHED. TUFFY LAYS ON HIS
    BACK AND STARES AT THE SKY SLOWLY FADING FROM THIS WORLD. JUST BEFORE HIS EYES CLOSE THERE IS A BRIGHT LIGHT FROM
    ABOVE DESCENDING ONTO HIM AND A VOICE "MY CHILD YOU HAVE DONE WELL NOW IS NOT THE TIME FOR YOU TO LEAVE THIS PLANE".
    ALL OF A SUDDEN TUFFYS HEART SPEEDS UP TO A NORMAL PACE HIS LUNGS DRAIN OF BLOOD THE STRENGTH RETURNS TO HIS ARMS
    AND LEGS HE STANDS. THERE IS A MUSCULAR GREY HAIR AND GREY BEADED SHIRTLESS MAN STANDING IN FRONT OF HIM. "GOD!" TUFFY
    SAYS IN A SURPRISED VOICE. "YES" THE SAYS IN A DEEP VOICE THAT SOUNDS LIKE THUNDER. "BUT YOU ARE THE ONE I HAVE BEEN
    LOOKING FOR, YOU NEED TO ANSWER FOR WHAT YOU HAVE DONE WHAT YOU HAVE ALLOWED TO HAPPEN" TUFFY PROCLAIMS IN AN ANGRY
    VOICE. "MY WILL IS GREATER THEN YOU CAN EVER KNOW TRUST MY CHILD AND YOU WILL BE SAVED, NOW LEAVE THIS PLACE" GOD
    VOICE POUNDING INTO TUFFYS HEAD SO HE TURNS AND WALKS TOWARD THE ELEVATOR. ONCE IN THE ELEVATOR TUFFYS SENSES RETURN
    AND HE HEADS BACK TO THE ROOF. AS THE ELEVATOR DOORS OPEN THERE IS SATAN ASS FUCKING GOD WHILE HE IS FEASTING ON
    OPRAHS REMAINS. TUFFY SHAKES HIS HEAD AND RAISES A PALM TO HIS FACE "NOT AGAIN" TUFFYS SAYS IS A SHAKY VOICE

    THAT IS TUFFY'S LEGEND

    STAY TUNED FOR THE CHRONICLE'S OF TUFFY
  • GULCH_OF_ROTGULCH_OF_ROT Posts: 5,795 salt miner
    YOU KNOW THAT MOTHER FUCKERS
  • Ace_Deputy_CheezeAce_Deputy_Cheeze Posts: 14,736 jayfacer
    I always imagined him as a squirrel
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  • GULCH_OF_ROTGULCH_OF_ROT Posts: 5,795 salt miner
    TUFFY IS A SQUIRREL?
  • Ace_Deputy_CheezeAce_Deputy_Cheeze Posts: 14,736 jayfacer
    TUFFY IS A SQUIRREL?
    I always imagined him as a squirrel
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  • GULCH_OF_ROTGULCH_OF_ROT Posts: 5,795 salt miner
    FIRST LINE IN STORY

    ONCE THERE WAS A MAN WITH NUTS OF RUFFNESS AND HE WAS ALSO VERY TUFFY

    PERHAPS HIS FATHER WAS A SQUIRREL AND HIS MOTHER WAS A REDNECK?
  • Ace_Deputy_CheezeAce_Deputy_Cheeze Posts: 14,736 jayfacer
    never bothered to read.
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  • GULCH_OF_ROTGULCH_OF_ROT Posts: 5,795 salt miner
    never bothered to read.
    I IS SAD

    THIS STORY IS MY GREATEST CONTRIBUTION TO THE WORLD
  • Ace_Deputy_CheezeAce_Deputy_Cheeze Posts: 14,736 jayfacer
    no,
    its GOR baby logo.
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  • GULCH_OF_ROTGULCH_OF_ROT Posts: 5,795 salt miner
    no,
    its GOR baby logo.
    READ STORY I PROMISE IT WILL NOT BE DISAPPOINTING
  • GULCH_OF_ROTGULCH_OF_ROT Posts: 5,795 salt miner
    YOU READ OR YOU DIE
  • GULCH_OF_ROTGULCH_OF_ROT Posts: 5,795 salt miner
    YOU READ OR YOU DIE
  • HeisenbergHeisenberg Posts: 10,361 balls deep
    @-)
    Mayhem Denver '08, Albuquereque '09/'10/'11 2012 ????????? peyton manning broncos Pictures, Images and Photos
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