youre miserable because you want to be miserable. Its the only thing you know and understand. Until you are willing to take some risks and jump out of your comfortable zone you will never be happy. You hve to accept yourself for everything you are, Good and bad, before you can truely be happy. Thats not going to happen unless you are willing to do things you think arent for you.
Well then you should probably just kill yourself lol. Or seek medical help from a doctor or psychiatrist or something. Happiness is a continual process that takes a long time, not to mention most people experience high points and low points and never just live happily for long periods of time.
I think why we recommend weed and psychedelics (they're not nearly in the same league) is because they help you see/undertand new perspectives on life that could help how you view yourself and the world. They can help change your priorities. But whatever. From what you seem to be doing, I think the best course of action is keep exercising, eat better, and maybe get some professional help.
Seriously though MC, you should probably seek professional help. You're young, you have a college degree in a field you love, and you're talented. Things might not be ideal right now but just keep at it man and things will get better. Things always get better.
Its a lot. I kinda talked about it with Satan a few days ago. But I just feel lost, directionless, and hopeless. Everything I do fails. Literally everything. I cant get a band going. My own music sucks. Nobody wants me to record them. Nobody will even let me sit in on a session. My work wont hire me fulltime. I've been out of school for a year, and still cant find sustainable work. I try networking everywhere I go, nobody ever calls me back, or emails me. I just had a car accident, and now my savings are shot. A year of work pissed away. Im always pissed off and sad. I dont fit in socio-politically with my generation. And its affecting how I view the world and other people. Even things I love are full of irritations now, like comics, metal, and video games. Nobody gives a shit about my Youtube channel, despite putting a lot of effort in videos and sharing it around. I cant even get my friends to share posts on Facebook for me. Im fat and ugly, and its starting to wear down the little self esteem I had. Im getting worse with women to the point where I dont know how to remotely interract with them anymore. And getting 0 matches on multiple dating apps is kinda telling that girls just flat out dont like me. Im becoming more and more picky, but every day Im less and less desirable, and I feel like relationships are a lost cause. Life sucks. Like straight up sucks.
Like I used to have dreams and aspirations. Now I just float through life. And the only advice people give me is "try harder". Well Im doing all I fucking can. I try different angles, and talk to different people every day, and nothing works. My life is just one big loss after loss after loss. It gets old. Like no facet of my life is working out. And Im really getting fucked up about it. I constantly feel empty, hopeless, sad, and angry. And its resulting in extreme nihilism and apathy. But I literally dont know what to do about it.
I didn't read it until now but MC you don't even realize that you have already started working on fixing this shit. You started working out, that is a huge step though it may not seem like it. Once you've got a routine down for a month it will become habit. Running has greatly helped the way I feel and oddly enough I have a lot more energy. Things take time but make sure you keep with it. It alsp wouldnt hurt to seek someone professional to talk to about these issues. As I said though you've taken a good step without realizing it
You tryin to be a hero fool? You wanna see badass mother fucker?! I'll show ya a badass!!!
woke up stepped in dog bowl and broke it couldn't find wallet flung pants i Air to look for wallet pants hit light fixture and knock it down and break it had to leave for work with no wallet
on top of all that i had a phone tech come in and discover why out fax line isnt working. Turns out its comcasts fault even though i called them 4 times about it and they insisted it wasnt their modems problem.
youre miserable because you want to be miserable. Its the only thing you know and understand. Until you are willing to take some risks and jump out of your comfortable zone you will never be happy. You hve to accept yourself for everything you are, Good and bad, before you can truely be happy. Thats not going to happen unless you are willing to do things you think arent for you.
Ehhh if we're talking clinical depression no. It's not a choice. Even I was perfectly aware of things in my life that could get me back on track and levelling me off neurochemically but in my depression I a) didn't have the energy/clarity of thought to do any of it and b) was too proud to seek help despite knowing I was depressed
A good portion of people view professional help as a sign of weakness because they don't have a good grasp on what depression is in the first place. They (and this includes me) think their depression is a lense of clarity on which they view the world.
But from this whole interaction MC, I recommend just looking up some basic neuroscience on the internet. Taking a class on biological basis for behavior was one of the best things I could have done for some insight onto my own mental health. Find out how it is marijuana and SSRI's interact with your brain and what they actually DO in the first place.
I dont view clinical help as a weakness but i also believe a lot of diagnosed depression is a product of our society and the way we live and eat. Most issues with the way your brain functions is the way you handle your gut health. Thats a much more leading cause in depression than you think. I guarantee one of the sources of his depression is his diet.
A bad diet combined with the way mc lets social media effect his life is a combination that leads directly to depression. Were depressed more now as a society than ever and technology has a direct link to that. Were not doing what our bodies are supposed to be doing and its causing chemical imbalances in his brain.
mc needs to keep working put. Thats a first step. If he eats a balanced diet and goes on a few nature hykes this summer he will be fine.
Im also not saying that clinical help is the wrong thing to do. I just feel like people are to quick to jump to doctors for help. most doctors youre going to go see either dont care what you should take, or dont have enpugh understanding of neuroscience themselves to prescribe the correct drug. A specialist would, but most primary care doctors are too busy or are getting paid by someone to push their drugs on people to diagnose them correctly.
But yeah an ssri is probably what he needs. ALl this technology depletes your brain of its serotonin. Again though Not using your phone as much, and eating right could help balance that.
Comments
Being happy is a choice.
feeling happy is also a choice but an easier one
youre miserable because you want to be miserable. Its the only thing you know and understand. Until you are willing to take some risks and jump out of your comfortable zone you will never be happy. You hve to accept yourself for everything you are, Good and bad, before you can truely be happy. Thats not going to happen unless you are willing to do things you think arent for you.
I think why we recommend weed and psychedelics (they're not nearly in the same league) is because they help you see/undertand new perspectives on life that could help how you view yourself and the world. They can help change your priorities. But whatever. From what you seem to be doing, I think the best course of action is keep exercising, eat better, and maybe get some professional help.
"i'm more depressed than i've ever been"
"you should probably just kill yourself lol"
wouldnt hurt to seek someone professional to talk to about these issues. As I said though you've taken a good step without realizing it
woke up
stepped in dog bowl and broke it
couldn't find wallet
flung pants i Air to look for wallet
pants hit light fixture and knock it down and break it
had to leave for work with no wallet
on top of all that i had a phone tech come in and discover why out fax line isnt working. Turns out its comcasts fault even though i called them 4 times about it and they insisted it wasnt their modems problem.
A good portion of people view professional help as a sign of weakness because they don't have a good grasp on what depression is in the first place. They (and this includes me) think their depression is a lense of clarity on which they view the world.
But from this whole interaction MC, I recommend just looking up some basic neuroscience on the internet. Taking a class on biological basis for behavior was one of the best things I could have done for some insight onto my own mental health. Find out how it is marijuana and SSRI's interact with your brain and what they actually DO in the first place.
A bad diet combined with the way mc lets social media effect his life is a combination that leads directly to depression. Were depressed more now as a society than ever and technology has a direct link to that. Were not doing what our bodies are supposed to be doing and its causing chemical imbalances in his brain.
mc needs to keep working put. Thats a first step. If he eats a balanced diet and goes on a few nature hykes this summer he will be fine.
Im also not saying that clinical help is the wrong thing to do. I just feel like people are to quick to jump to doctors for help. most doctors youre going to go see either dont care what you should take, or dont have enpugh understanding of neuroscience themselves to prescribe the correct drug. A specialist would, but most primary care doctors are too busy or are getting paid by someone to push their drugs on people to diagnose them correctly.
its been an incredibly fucked up morning. 0
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