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Jobes raps, well less than 50% of them.
Gazorpazorpfield
Posts: 22,293 master of ceremonies
Chavey and Horizonz have less skills than k-fed.
Horizonz has enouch fachina yeast to make bread.
Chavey still wants to get her legs spread
He will hit it so hard he will leave her with a stutter
While he licks his fingers sayin "I can't believe that its not butter. "
-----------------
Exactley. What? The Fuck? Are you trying to say?
Your whole rapping style was gay.
Now I might be just a crazy guy.
But chavey has a crush on horizonz's lazy eye.
Horizonz hides the fact she is an emo and I don't know why.
And won't show a picture she looks like a guy.
Zing.
Pow.
Sham fuckin wow.
Tell me bitch, what's up now
-----------------
*MTV news flash, this is Tabitha Soren*
Somebody went nuts and slaughtered the forum.
No one heard a sound.
No witness to be found.
Chavey the asshat
Got his ass capped
Wrapped in plastic
The scene is pretty graphic.
Horizonz body, that's a different story.
Turns out she was a boy named cory. Tryin had to be a girl on the scene, while he ran around with his dick tucked between
His legs while he ran his mouth.
They found him chopped in pieces and scattered around the house.
Then they found the body of a pesty little squirt,
someone took the life of an emo in an analfest shirt.
He tried to run and hide,
did his best to suvive,
but when he couldn't get away he commied suicide.
Somebody shocked him twice, brought him back to life
Just to give his neck a slice.
And stab him with a knife.
Another dead body, this one not like Hannible,
he is a different type of man eating Cannible.
Dick in his throat, he began to choke, on a hot load of semen,
he started screamin,
wobbilin and weavin
till he started to draw attention,
so it was time for a lynchin.
Rope in a tree his life was at its end, till his fat ass made the branch start to bend.
The end.
Horizonz has enouch fachina yeast to make bread.
Chavey still wants to get her legs spread
He will hit it so hard he will leave her with a stutter
While he licks his fingers sayin "I can't believe that its not butter. "
-----------------
Exactley. What? The Fuck? Are you trying to say?
Your whole rapping style was gay.
Now I might be just a crazy guy.
But chavey has a crush on horizonz's lazy eye.
Horizonz hides the fact she is an emo and I don't know why.
And won't show a picture she looks like a guy.
Zing.
Pow.
Sham fuckin wow.
Tell me bitch, what's up now
-----------------
*MTV news flash, this is Tabitha Soren*
Somebody went nuts and slaughtered the forum.
No one heard a sound.
No witness to be found.
Chavey the asshat
Got his ass capped
Wrapped in plastic
The scene is pretty graphic.
Horizonz body, that's a different story.
Turns out she was a boy named cory. Tryin had to be a girl on the scene, while he ran around with his dick tucked between
His legs while he ran his mouth.
They found him chopped in pieces and scattered around the house.
Then they found the body of a pesty little squirt,
someone took the life of an emo in an analfest shirt.
He tried to run and hide,
did his best to suvive,
but when he couldn't get away he commied suicide.
Somebody shocked him twice, brought him back to life
Just to give his neck a slice.
And stab him with a knife.
Another dead body, this one not like Hannible,
he is a different type of man eating Cannible.
Dick in his throat, he began to choke, on a hot load of semen,
he started screamin,
wobbilin and weavin
till he started to draw attention,
so it was time for a lynchin.
Rope in a tree his life was at its end, till his fat ass made the branch start to bend.
The end.
Post edited by Gazorpazorpfield on
Comments
My rhymes are mountains, flowing like fountains
Your skills are the size of little hills
Made by an army ants
Horizonz woulda pissed her pants
but Jamie crept in and took em
She was rubbin one out and wasn't lookin
But jamie is even skinnia than india
So he was cussin and bitchin
That those damn pants didn't fit him
Gunner walked in so we hit him
Chavey better watch who he's dissin.
-----------------
That was a fantastic rap
Four a 5 year old autistic kid addicted to crack.
I was mean to horizonz and chaveys gonna snap
Right after he gives horizonz picture a fap
Fap fap fappity fap
He's never gonna get anywhere like that
Dreaming about droppin his balls on her chin
Oh shit, he's fapping again
Asshat you gotta put down those polaroids
Your forearms look like your on steroids
Arms all huge like a green bruce banner
You can't keep going on in that manner
Save your money, get a ticket, book a flight
You could hit that this time tomorrow night
But I don't do reviews like Erik Evangelion
Her pussy only gets a 7 outta 10.
-----------------
-----------------
OFFICIAL SAGA
Chuck and Horizonz: The Saga
A story of love lust and internet drama, and what really happend to Chuck's baby mama. Part -1
Horizonz lives in Jersey
Feeling unloved and unworthy
Spending her day, locked away
Never venturing into public
Last time she did someone screamed "WTF is that? Oh mah god, someone club it! Kill it with the fires"
So now she spends her time on the interwires.
At the same time miles to the west
Is a midwestern asshat of the oppisite sex.
Why he's on the net all day no one knows
But ouside is someplace that he never goes
No time for sports like baseball or hockey
Instead he's on pornhub watching bukkake
Now as time went on, even that got old
All he wanted was a girl to hold
Horizonz only wanted a boy who would listen
Chavey wanted a girl who enjoyed a fistin
Then one day, everthing changed
The stars aligned as if it were arranged
Call it fate, destiny or just good luck
That was the day Horizons met Chuck.
They felt that attraction in an instant
On the net they met and fell in love, everyoneone could see this
If they signed up an account on sodomywithjesus
Chavey, weary of only having his dick in his hand
Quickly came up with a plan
Tired of being alone in this word
He would go and see this girl
And they would be together, for ever and ever
Chavey dressed all up in leather
Horizonz in a collar and hooked to a tether
Everything would be so wonderful and perfect
A companion for life so he doesn't have to jerk it
Quickly Chuck worked to gather some things
He grabbed his mommas purse, her keys, her rings
Jumped in the car still holding his peen
He was off to get the girl of his dreams...
-----------------
Let's travel back now, miles to the east
And check back with the hideous beast
Douching her box to kill off the yeast
Preping fo the day Chavey would feast
Trust in her eyes and lust in her thighs
And a back so hairy it looked like a guy's
She wondered if Chavey believed all her lies
Boy oh boy was he in for a surprise
But maybe he is different from the other guys
None of those guys would never understand
And that's why they ran away as fast as they can
But Chavey isn't like that hes a real man
But she couldn't risk it happening again
She couldn't talk, couldn't think or even breath it
Now way would she risk him leavin
Put it away, bottle it up and keep it
Chuck must never find out her secret
-----------------
Chavey hit the road in a flurry
Off to see horizonz in a hurry
In a race against time
His home left behind
Chavey had a one track mind
"Pussy Pussy Pussy Puss"
Chavey wondered if she shaved her bush
Preoccupication, Infatuation, masterbatation
Chavey should have paid attention to his current situation
Blinking lights, blinking lights, red and blue
It was at this point Chuck knew he was screwed
Hurry up dialing, get Horizonz on the phone
And let her know what was going on
Horizonz said Chuck I love you and will not fail
I promise to find a way to make your bail.
-----------------
Without Chavey, horizonz world was lost
She was determined to get him out no matter the cost
Mom wouldn't help, neither would her friends
She needed a plan to make some ends
There just had to be a way out
An easy way to collect a pay out
She could never explain how much Chavey was missed
Her only option was an ad on Craigslist
She checked her ad and found 13 hits
But would Chavey still love her if she went through with this?
Spiraling through a blacked abyss
Heart broken, choking down the pain
Horizonz was startled when her phone rang.
Wonder who could that possibly be
She quickley checked her caller I'd
She was overjoyed and delighted to see
It was a collect call from the county
Chuck is that you she screamed in the phone,did they lte you out? When you coming home?
"It all right" Chavey repliped
As he then broke down and cried
"its not ok, I'm sorry I lied
I can't take another day inside
My bunkie killed a girl with a wood chipper and turned her into mulch
Hez a crazy mother fucker they call Gulch
He wants to kill me next, he's fucking crazy
He beat another girl to death with a caps lock key
I don't care what you do, just get me out of here baby!"
-----------------
Horizonz thought who's gonna be the first sucker to pay me?
Response number 1 was from Jamie
Wasting no time arrangemets were made
Horizonz worndered how much she would be paid
Kicking shoes on her feet
She ran to the place where they would meet
In a cheap sleazy motel
Saturated with a moth ball smell
Everything seemed to be going well
But that would all change in the blink of an eye
For you see Jamie isn't a normal guy
He broke down and started to cry
"I'm a woman stuck in a mans body! Please tell me why!
I keep up with the trendy scenes
And prance around in womens jeans
And in my most secret of dreams
I'm slathered in Mansons golden streams
I want to close my eyes and sqeal with glee
While you take a piss on me.
Just to show that you care
And tell me I'm pretty while you're brushing my hair"
In less than 30 seconds she was out of there
Chuck needed out, this much was true
But she would rather try her luck
With client number 2.
But
-----------------
As the memory of date number one still lingers
Checking post number 2 she crossed her fingers
Thinking "God make this one go a little better please"
She open a repsonse from a man called Deputy Cheese
Back to the hotel, armed with febreeze
she saw the duputy and instantly was pleased
A minute later Cheese was in charge
Barkin out orders just like a real Sarge
"Bitch, mah name is Cheese.
Get down onto yo knees
And start licking on these while I give those little tits a squeeze"
He dropped his pants down to his feet
And the smell of his nuts knocked her on her seat
"Hurry up bitch, I'm payin by the hour"
Horizonz said " When was the last time you took a shower?
Dude, your balls smell like milk that went sour.
And turned into chunks and sat in the sun.
This is more fucked up than date number one
You're just as nasty as could be.
I gonna go call date number 3.
I
A month and a half, still not a sight
Deep in his heart Chavey knew it wasn't right
and said Gulch we gotta get out tonight
And he pulled on the bars with all his might
Gulch said "boy you ain't too bright
You wanna break out but your not doing it right
Just sit back and leave it to me
None of these bitches can handle my caps lock key
And I have a few more surprises in line
Don't worry chuck, we will make it out just fine
Let make a few calls to some friends of mine
And by midnight tonight we will be across state lines
Put these plugs in your ears so you don't loose your mind
Chavey was confused and didn't understand it
But he followed the directions of the man that planned it.
10 o'clock comes and the guards are all frantic
They heard a chugging sound and couldn't stand it
And they ran to the parking lot in a panic
Chugga chugga chugga was making them manic
Depressive, oppressive till they couldn't move their feet from the ground
Brains wouldn't function because of the sound
Scene kids started gathering all around
The guards of the jail were trapped in a never ending breakdown
The earth started to rumble from shitty music
It caused the wall to crack so Gulch and Chavey slipped right through it
Gulch said "thanks to those queers from suicide silence
We will escape without any violence
But we must hide where no man will ever find ya"
Gulch and Chuck slid into Oprah's vagina