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How do you make a perfect bowl of cereal?

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  • GazorpazorpfieldGazorpazorpfield Posts: 22,293 master of ceremonies
  • GazorpazorpfieldGazorpazorpfield Posts: 22,293 master of ceremonies
    Yup, its time to write this shit. Probably presenting Wednesday.
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  • HeisenbergHeisenberg Posts: 10,361 balls deep
    you put the milk in first
    Mayhem Denver '08, Albuquereque '09/'10/'11 2012 ????????? peyton manning broncos Pictures, Images and Photos
  • GazorpazorpfieldGazorpazorpfield Posts: 22,293 master of ceremonies
    Hitler. Get your Nazi beliefs out of here.
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  • GazorpazorpfieldGazorpazorpfield Posts: 22,293 master of ceremonies
    edited May 2010
    Well this is what I got in the 20 minutes I did it. I'm gotta go for now. Finish it later.

    I tried to keep it entertaining. It looks better in word, its double spaced and shit. Also, I'm sure there are errors and stuff...I typed it quick to get it done, which I didn't quite.

    How to Make a Bowl of Cereal
    Scientist believe that humans have been making cereal out of refined wheat and barley for over twenty-three thousand years. The very first boxed cereal was made in 1863 by James C. Jackson. Today, nearly fifty percent of all Americans begin their day with a bowl of cereal. The average American eats one hundred and sixty bowls of cereal a year. Worldwide, over 2.7 billion boxes of cereal are sold.
    Here I am going to explain some of the common ways to make a bowl of cereal. The first step can take place in a store where you buy your cereal. The key part in making a good bowl of cereal is having a brand that you like. Of course you have to try some out before you find one you really like, so it is possible that for this situation you are trying a new brand of cereal. Once you have the cereal and are still at the store, you should do a mental checklist in your head. Do you have milk? Do you have a spoon? Is this spoon clean? What about a bowl? If you are not sure that you have all of the above, it is suggested that you purchase whatever it is that you need.
    Now you are home and ready to make this bowl of cereal. The first step in the actual preparation is to get our the milk, bowl, and spoon or spork if for whatever reason you do not have a spoon available. Depending on the cereal you have, you may want to add fresh cut fruit such as bananas, strawberries, etc. This next step is completely up to you, however if you were a normal person, you would do it as I describe. First you open and pour the cereal in to the bowl. Then you will pour the milk. Once again, the two are reversible, but it is recommended that you pour the cereal first. Pouring milk first has one major disadvantage, it can mess up your proportions. While pouring the milk first has a major disadvantage, pouring the milk into a bowl already filled with cereal has one major advantage. This advantage is that you control where the milk hit’s the cereal. In a way this eliminates one always fun step, and that is stirring the cereal to even out the bowl. This step is more than fun, it is also an anti-depressant. Imagine this, you wake up feeling a little down, you pour yourself a bowl of fruity pebbles and boom, your mind is already off what is distracting you. Then you are instantly drawn into the haze of what is now you stirring your cereal. This however may not distract you from the most depressing of events.
    Now back to where we were. You now have cereal and milk. Depending on what cereal you have, you may want to add sugar. Take Pops for example, the stuff is pretty boring. Add a little sugar to liven things up. Rule #1, Cereal is not a concentration camp. You should, for the most part, be happy while eating cereal, and if you are depressed, it should not be at the expense of the cereal. Anyway, you may now finally begin to eat your cereal. Remember to stir the cereal on occasion, you do not want half your cereal soggy and the other half dry. This brings me to another step. Nobody wants soggy cereal except maybe a man the gets joy out of children crying. Now depending on what cereal you are eating, some get soggy faster than others, but in the end it comes down to having a good stir method and not being a slow eater. Keep eating until you are finished with the cereal. Chances are you will have some leftover milk. With milk you can do one of three things, drink the milk, dispose of the milk via the sink, or pour another bowl.
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  • HeisenbergHeisenberg Posts: 10,361 balls deep
    edited May 2010
    what class is this for?
    Mayhem Denver '08, Albuquereque '09/'10/'11 2012 ????????? peyton manning broncos Pictures, Images and Photos
  • SantanaSantana Posts: 16,743 juggalo
    I never stir my cereal around. I like crunchy cereal
  • OPPOPP Posts: 50,132 spicy boy
    Eating it dry ftw.
    I love winning with women
  • SantanaSantana Posts: 16,743 juggalo
    ^ I can't do that
  • OPPOPP Posts: 50,132 spicy boy
    HOW??? It's so much better like that... I hate eating soggy food. It's disgusting.
    I love winning with women
  • NecrothulhuNecrothulhu Posts: 33,444 master of ceremonies
    It is disgusting....that's why I eat it fast
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  • ZmbieFlavrdCupcakesZmbieFlavrdCupcakes Posts: 32,259 jayfacer
    thats what he said
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  • OPPOPP Posts: 50,132 spicy boy
    But who wants to rush eating?
    I love winning with women
  • If you were paid by the hour to look gay










































    YOU'D BE A FUCKING MILLIONAIRE!
  • OPPOPP Posts: 50,132 spicy boy
    That's not very encouraging advice...
    I love winning with women
  • ^Everyone has talent








































    YOU HAVE MORE!
  • OPPOPP Posts: 50,132 spicy boy
    "FUCK YEA"
    I love winning with women
  • SantanaSantana Posts: 16,743 juggalo
    "HOW??? It's so much better like that... I hate eating soggy food. It's disgusting."
    I answer with this:
    "It is disgusting....that's why I eat it fast"

    you pretty much just keep it as crunchy as possible while you eat it
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